Dirty Sons of Pitches

In Eric's absence, Ben and Nate watched and then recorded their stunned reactions to the Full Moon Pictures' horror release, "Ooga Booga," about a killer African stereotype doll inhabited with the spirit of a slain black man. Yeah, you better believe it's pretty racist. Nate and Ben discuss the most outrageous moments and elements from the movie while also discussing the fine line between ironic commentary on race and sloppy shock value. Stacy Keach, what are you doing in this garbage? Also, for the racist in your family, make sure you collect the whole set of culturally insensitive dolls the movie trots out, which it is literally selling. Good God. And that's just scratching the surface with this movie.

Also available on iTunes!

Direct download: ooga_booga.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 4:36pm EDT

It's an assembly for the ages, where the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have reached out to frequent guests George, Drew, and Chris Holben for the purposes of one great brainstorm session to come up with a sequel for Ridley Scott's "Prometheus." Afterwards, they play a big game of the Gut-Check Challenge. Along the way they tlak about Katherine Hepburn's incontinence, Jar Jar Binks as the Falstaff of the "Star Wars" universe, Jeffrey Jones' legal troubles, Adele's suicide note put to song winning an Oscar, making a computer to scale from a cocktail napkin (thanks "Superman III"), moving one's affections from Kathy Ireland to Wallace Shawn, judging movies via their posters, the logistics of having sex if you're a creature made of eyes, why the scientists in "Prometheus" are the stupidest people ever, the seventh best David Lynch movie, and the overall collective ignorance of female anatomy.

Also available on iTunes!

Episode 46 includes:

-George turns back time via flying backwards and has a lot of things to say about "Superman" and Richard Donner's "Superman II."

-We got nostalgia for everything: "Mom and Dad Save the World," "Power Rangers"

-The Adele/Robert Goulet-as-Adele impressions will not stop, thank you very much.

-"Oblivion": derivitive but it's got Tom Cruise and explosions, so good.

-This Week's Pitch -- 'Prometheus' Sequel!

-The collective brainstorm a natural sequel for Ridley Scott's "Alien" prequel, since the man himself needs the help.

-This Week's Game -- Gut-Check Challenge!

-Six men out-bid one another to see who can name the most movies starring selected actors. You may be surprised by the eventual winner. 

       Send your feedback, suggestions, and love letters to pitchcast@yahoo.com

Direct download: pitch_46.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:55pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" welcome two guests, returning show mascot Chris Holben and Ben's mother. They go back to previous pitches and take another shot at them, and then the game this week is replaced with a bonus discussion over various fantasy worlds they consider entering. Along the way they also cover such topics like defiling Pinhead's puzzle box, the posibility of a Kickstarter to have Ben udnergo gender reassignment surgery, Ben's mother as a shape-shifter, the cross-gender "Cloud Atlas" porn parody, how should one watch a movie musical, the importance of pubic hair according to "Trance," the modern-day Ruffio, Ben's desire to become a bully against hobbits and munchkins, the unnatural hormonal reactions to the witches in Disney's "Hocus Pocus,"  and Ben's mother's admission that she's looking for tips on time travel to stop the birth of Ben.

Epsiode 45 includes:

-Guess what the guys suggest to do with a mystery box? Hint: It later involves a mystery baby.

-Welcome thousands of new downloaders... or a few guys data-mining our catalog of shows.

-"42" is a movie with just the right amount of racism.

-Ben unexpectedly loves "Rock of Ages" and "Amour" and challenges Nate.

-"Temptation": Unequivocal proof that Tyler Perry hates women.

-This Week's Pitch -- Pitch Redemption III!

-Chris Holben pitches his epic dragon fantasy as well as a TV show for "Van Helsing."

-Eric pitches an American version of "Dr. Who" with Ben as the companion!

-Ben pitches a trio of holiday-themed horror movies including living snow.

-Nate pitches a Western based upon a Chinese laborer who becomes a small-town sheriff.

-Bonus Discussion -- Fantasy Worlds!

-The gang debates what fantasy worlds they would want to enter: Narnia, Camelot, Neverland, Wonderland, Middle Earth, Westeros, Hogwarts, and... the Netherlands.

                Send your feedback, suggestions, and love letters to pitchcast@yahoo.com

Direct download: pitch_45.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:05pm EDT

The guys are back with a pitch this week and plenty of them. The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking another crack at adapting movies into TV properties and then they play another round of the easy-to-play game, This Meets That. Along the way they confuse "Meet the Peebles" and "Meet the Feebles" and "Meet the Deedles," memories with Siskel and Ebert, Ben's arson inspiration from Billy Joel and how criminals trip up confessing wrongdoing through song, GIANT SPACE RODS, Ben's grandfather turning on Julie Andrews after she went topless in a movie, the terror of Canadian fascist aliens, Killer Klown apocalypses, and somehow the memory of the little-seen "Terms of Endearment" sequel, "The Evening Star."

Also available on iTunes!

Episode 44 includes:

-The guys pay their repsects to film critic and influence, Roger Ebert.

-Ben's stance on "G.I. Joe: Retaliation": They might as well be making love to the guns.

-"The Host": The fate of the world rests on one annoying teenager's love triangle.

-The aliens can conquer space travel but not contact lenses?

-This Week's Pitch -- Adapt a Movie to TV Series!

-Nate pitches a different take on the upcoming "World War Z."

-Eric pitches many things, including "Django Unchained," "Paul," and "Hobo with a Shotgun"

-Ben pitches several concepts like a demonic "Alien Nation"-style buddy cop series, and a John McClane saves-the-day-a-week show.

-This Week's Game -- This Meets That!

-They replay another batch of wild combinations of two different movie properties.

Send your feedback, suggestions, and love letters to pitchcast@yahoo.com

Direct download: pitch_44.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:56pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" had a great idea, to watch the lowest-grossing wide release film of all time, "The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure." It'll be fun, they reasoned. Oh how wrong they were. Recording minutes after finishing that awful children's movie, the guys unleash their thoughts and reflections, trying to make sense of what will never make sense. If you've ever wanted to know what this movie was about, or what makes it... special, then this podcast will be enlightening and entertaining. Next week, they swear they'll have an actual pitch.

Also available on iTunes!

Episode 43 includes:

-Two sad bits of news: the demise of "Poddammit" and the passing of "Pie in the Sky's" Richard Griffiths

-"Spring Breakers": If Terrence Malick made an exploitation film, this would be it.

-"Come Out and Play": Can a bad movie be saved by three minutes of cathartic (evil) child-killing?

-Ben finds the caveman version of Emma Stone to be... stirring.

-New Segment -- What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- "The Oogieloves Movie"

-Meet the movie that officially broke Ben. He is a ruined man.

-Milkshake drinking contests, gassy birds, quadriplegic pillows, bad messages for children, and you can even watch Cary Elwes soul die HERE.

-Is Wendy the Window really an evil force purposely trapped in a window pane and manipulating others to be free? And how long before J. Edgar Hoover tries to make a move on her? What did I just write?

-Your kids deserve better, parents and exclusive Wal-Mart shoppers.

          Send your feedback, suggestions, and love letters to pitchcast@yahoo.com

Direct download: pitch_43.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:07pm EDT