Dirty Sons of Pitches

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are once again watching the worst of the worst, this time a low-budget (veeeeeeery low-budget) Canadian superhero film that feels like a knockoff of a knockoff. Watch adults in masks and constumes talk in monotone! Watch ineffective action and gunplay! Watch... or don't, just losten to Ben and Nate rehash the pain of this movie. The guys also chat about recent film news and review "Avengers: Age of Ulrton," so just consider this the all-Avengers podcast.

Also available on iTunes.

Direct download: avenging_force.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 8:09pm EDT
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The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are bookin' suspects this week with a podcast where they pitch police themed shows and movies, in dubious honor of the new "Paul Blart" sequel. This week's game is a return of Movies Against Humanity and a return to the madness and pop-culture analysis that you've come to expect after 100 podcasts with these gentlemen.

Also available in iTunes.

Episode 109 includes:

-The Scatman can. The Scatman. Can. (cue endless scatting)

-Reactions to "Batman vs Superman" trailer are decidedly... dour.

-"Get Hard" is as unfunny and homophobic as its dumb title promises.

-Netflix's "Daredevil" erases the bad taste of the Ben Affleck film. Mostly.

-This Week's Pitch -- Cop Movies/Shows!

-Ben pitches a found footage film from police body cameras, a procedural where a new drug reveals a supernatural killer, and a giant spider monster that stalks the streets for justice.

-Nate pitches a crime thriller where a U.S. MP and a former Iraqi Republican Guard investigator must work together in recent post-war Iraq to catch a killer of women.

-This Week's Game -- Movies Against Humanity!

-The guys compete arguing which film titles are best represented in a series of categories, much like Cards Against Humanity.

Direct download: pitch_109.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:18am EDT
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The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking into the strange realm of cults for their pitches this week, inspired by the HBO documentary that the Church of Scientology does not want you to see. The guys catch up on "Furious 7" and "Insurgent" and "Cinderella," as well as other movies, and spend so much time chatting about their pitches, and especially the movies, that they have no time for a game this week.

Also available on iTunes.

Episode 108 includes:

-The guys propose a very unclean homeopathic option they read about. You'll want to wash your hands verrily after listening.

-"Furious 7" might be slightly less furious-er than previous installments, but it's still furious-ish enough to be satisfying.

-Ben and Nate argue the merit over retelling another "Cinderella" movie.

-"Going Clear" goes there when it comes to Scientology.

-This Week's Pitch -- Cults!

-Nate pitches a survivor of a death cult who's hunted down by the remaining members who can only go to the afterlife is all of the death cult members are suitably dead.

-Ben pitches a reprogrammer who kidnaps a cult member for mysterious and vengeful purposes.

-This Week's Game -- None!

Direct download: pitch_108.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:58pm EDT
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"Amazing" might be too generous a term, or perhaps it's exactly fitting. Ben and Nate are still left scratching their heads to assess the ripoff of a ripoff, "The Amazing Bulk," about a scientist who turns into a big purple man of rage. It's also entirely filmed on green screen and many of the visuals look like they were made in MS Paint. Listen as Ben and Nate try their best to make sense of this 75-minute excuse for a movie.

Also available on iTunes.

Direct download: bulk-A.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 10:17pm EDT
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The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are revving up their engines in preparation for the next "Fast and Furious" entry by pitching car chase stories. If Hollywood loves itself a movie brokered around car chases, well here's the next hot would-be franchises. The guys also discuss the various world of YA novels-turns-movies and go over the pros and cons of each realm from a cost-of-living standpoint. 

Also available on iTunes.

Episode 107 includes:

-The guys address the people from the future who have a very specific prediliction.

-Batman cover art: should the artist every censor art from outside pressure? Can you see this cover and not understand the offense?

-Ben champions "Z Nation" over "The Walking Dead."

-"Run All Night" is another decent Liam Neeson movie where he runs around with a gun and barks at people.

-This Week's Pitch -- Car Chase Movies!

-Ben pitches an escapaed prisoner story where rich elites bet on their prisoner, a supernatural car chase, and a road rage virus that forces others to hunt one another to the death.

-Nate pitches a closing of the borders in wake of a plague, so a family must race across the country to escape the closing quarantine.

-Bonus Discussion: YA Post-Apocalyptic Worlds!

-Ben and Nate talk about the worlds of YA staples like "Hunger Games," "Divergent," "Maze Runner," and others and discuss which world they would rather live in if they had to make a choice.

Direct download: pitch_107.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:58am EDT
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Ben and Nate explore what the folks at Aslyum have to offer with their requisite "50 Shades of Grey" knockoff, "Bound," starring Charisma Carpenter, best known as Cordelia on TV's "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." What starts as soft-core doldrums magically transforms in the third act into... something... surprising. It becomes a commentary against "50 Shades" and actually empowering. Shocking. Listen as Ben and Nate try and reconcile what they have watched and the nature of Asylum knockoffs.

Also available on iTunes.

Direct download: bound.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:53pm EDT
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The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recapping the Oscars and pitching movies akin to the recently crowned Best Picture winner, "Birdman." They're talking about movies that can be done all in one take. The guys also play another rendition of their game Five by Five and prove tht they either know too much or nothing at all. Learn what a "vag deferens" is at long last, as well as Lawrence Kasdan's last movie, the highs and lows of Stephen King adaptations,

Also available on iTunes.

Episode 106 includes:

-Oscar recap: Will Eddie Redmayne be doing unclean things for nickles at bus stations in 10 years time?

-Marvel takes back Spider-Man, but will it not spider-suck?

-"Harmontown" makes Ben "kinda hate Dan Harmon." Nate sees "Sex Tape" and it makes him kinda hate sex tapes.

-"Chappie" is like "Robocop" and "Short Circuit" had a baby and it grew up on trashy gangster rap.

-This Week's Pitch -- One-Take Movies!

-Nate pitches the last hours of a death row inmate, a view in a jury room, and an interrogation scenario all done in one take.

-Ben pitches a sniper film from a sniper's POV, split-screen movie, and a time traveler on an exploding airplane.

-This Week's Game -- Five by Five!

-Ben and Nate come up with specific film categories and have two options to win points: pick 5 movies no on the list for that category or pick all 5 that are on the list.

Direct download: pitch_106-A.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:47pm EDT
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In light of the runaway success of "50 Shades of Grey," Ben and Nate are pitching erotic thrillers to tanatlyze the creative possibilities. The guys get down and dirty with their bad selves and go to places they have routinely gone before on their podcast. Stay tuned for a further discussion on the gorwing industry of crypto-zoological erotic fiction.

Also availably on iTunes.

Episode 105 includes:

-Does Dorf still exist? Remember Dorf? Anybody?

-Nate and Ben make Oscar predicitons for the major categories. Ben complains again about the Oscars. Repeat.

-"Kingsman" is a head-poppin' good time, though relies a bit too heavily on the meta.

-Nate and Ben debate what is worst in "50 Shades" and there are many culprits.

-This Week's Pitch -- Erotic Thriller

-Nate pitches a coed who works as a high-end call girl who ends up being ensared in a political scandal.

-Ben pitches "Exit to Eden" but with Furries/Plushies and a reverse "50 Shades" scenario where a man seeks his dom.

-This Week's Game -- Fetish-Ize It!

-It's a spinoff of "Porno-Ize It" where we take peopular movies like "Back to the Future," "Birdman," and "The Godfather" and develop fetishes relted to the films' content.

Direct download: pitch_105.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:57pm EDT
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The guys are finally back to what their title imples -- pitches. The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are going back to their early podcast to honor the time they've spent recording and being ridiculous. Along the way the guys talk about a host of other weird topics.

Also available on iTunes.

Episode 104 includes:

-The guys come up with the perfect formula for a movie: Liam Neeson + dinosaurs + kicking dinosaurs + Hitler.

-The "Gravity" lawsuit may be the most important Hollywood trial you have absolutely no clue about.

-Nate says that "Jupiter Ascending" is laughably terrible with a lead character who should have just been left to fall to her death.

-Ben catches up on a slew of 2014 horror films and singles out "As Above So Below" as the one to see.

-This Week's Pitch -- Sequels!

-Nate pitches seques to "Boyhood," "Seven," and "School of Rock."

-Ben pitches sequels to "Misery," "Three Men and a Baby," "Pet Semetary," and "Silent Night Deadly Night."

-This Week's Game -- Sequel-ize It!

-The guys take their own pitches and push them even further with more sequels.

Direct download: pitch_104.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:17pm EDT
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Here's part two of the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" recording with special guest George. The guys continue talking about recent movies and then play an extended game of the Gut-Check Challenge. How many Kevin Bacon movies can you name?

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: pitch_103.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:19pm EDT
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