Dirty Sons of Pitches

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have triumphantly returned after a long though busy break. They have a lot of movies to cover and in honor of the new gritty, R-rated "Joker" film they will be pitching solo ventures in the same dark vein for Batman's other villains. The guys wind up an extra long podcast by channeling the spirit of Gene Shalit to come up with absurd blurbs for a selection of the movies reviewed.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Episode 247 includes:

-Sony and Marvel kiss and make up realizing they both really like money.

-Martin Scorsese says Marvel movies aren't movies.

-Ben says "The Addams Family" is a nice surprise.

-Nate spits out reviews for "Hustlers," "Ad Astra," "Gemini Man," "Judy," "Parasite," and the Fred Durst-directed, John Travolta-starring "The Fanatic."

-The new "Joker" is good but Ben contests mishandles the entire identity of what makes Joker the Joker. The guys also discuss the nature of comedy in this new era and whether Todd Phillips has any point in his declaration that you can't be funny anymore.

-This Week's Pitch -- Joker-fy Batman Villain Solo Films!

-The guys try and pitch gritty, R-rated solo outings and cast movies for Catwoman, Clay Face, Mr. Freeze, the Penguin, and a dozen other rogues.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take on the persona of America's favorite televised film critic to offer increasingly bizarre pun-laden blurbs for this week's films reviewed.

Direct download: pitch_247.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:59pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting paid to write, enjoy the latest edition of Ben and George's podcast "Saturday Night Jive" where they analyze a terrible movie starring an SNL cast member, and this week it's 2001's blaxploitation rip, "Pootie Tang," written and directed by future Me Too star, Louie C.K. It also presents a strong discussion point for the nature of controversial humor, the difference between racist humor and humor making fun of racism, and whether or not comedian Shane Gillis deserved to be deposed from the new cast of SNL over his past offensive statements.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Direct download: snj_pootie_tang.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 6:45pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and clowning around for the concluding sequel to Stephen King's hit movie, "It." The guys look to the months to come at a wide range of movies coming out that they may or may not be looking forward to, and they conclude the episode with another round of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be." You'll never look at kangaroos the same.

Available on iTunes and Spotfy

Episode 245 includes:

-Who would you cast for a "Face/Off" remake?

-D23 news: even MORE Marvel TV series! More!

-Ben finds the "Dora the Explorer" movie to be a cute and delightful family adventure film.

-"It Chapter 2" isn't quite what Chapter One offered, but we all knew this was coming, right?

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-Bonus Discussion -- Looking Ahead to 2019!

-The guys look ahead at two dozen movies coming out between now and the end of the year.

This Week's Game -- "So Shalit Be"

-The guys play another edition of imitating the spirit of America's favorite TV film critic, Gene Shalit, to summarize via blurbs the films reviewed this week.

Direct download: pitch_246.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:00pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and picking up the pieces of major reshuffling, from Blumhouse pulling a release to recent tragedies to Sony and Marvel ending their shared partnership with Spider-Man over money. In honor of "Ready or Not," the guys pitch movies featuring the hunting of humans, and then they end another episode with America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be?" where they summarize the movies reviewed through the spirit of notable TV film critic, Gene Shalit. 

Available on iTunes and Spotify 

Episode 245 includes: 

-"The Hunt" gets pulled from release following mass shootings, which means it will.... never have a safe period to be released. 

-Sony and Marvel break up over Spider-Man visitation rights. 

-Nate struggles to say too many positive things for "The Kitchen," "Dark Iris," and "Where Did You Go, Bernadette?" 

-"Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" is creepy and a fine introduction to horror for younger kids. 

-"Ready or Not" is a blast and might be Ben's favorite movie of 2019! 

-This Week's Pitch -- Human Hunting! 

-Nate pitches a very uptight librarian keeping order and white nationalist militias deputized by a racist president to round up whatever "illegals" they find. 

-Ben pitches a cannibal president, an extreme marriage counseling couples session, and a hunt through time using the weapons of its older era. 

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! 

-The guys assume the mantle of TV film critic Gene Shalit by providing increasingly insane blurbs for the movies covered this week.

Direct download: pitch_245.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:37pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are revving those engines, a term that seems less and less applicable with every sequel, for the "Fast and Furious" spinoff, "Hobbs & Shaw." The guys pitch tag-team spinoffs and then conclude with another round of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be" where the guys imitate national treasure Gene Shalit to come up with movie blurbs for the films covered that week.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Episode 244 includes:

-Get ready for the worst podcast idea of all time, and making it about "Batman vs Superman" is only part of the reason why.

-Stephen King writing new ending for "The Stand."

-Tarantino's "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood" is a stroll down his memories. A leisurely stroll.

-Indie roundup: "The Farewell," "High-Life," and an Ohio-made drama, "Huckleberry."

-"Hobbs & Shaw" is basically everything you want it to be, and that's not enough for Ben.

-This Week's Pitch -- Tag-Team Spinoffs!

-Ben pitches an Indiana Jones team of Mutt and Short Round, a man and a sentient zombie, the dinosaurs in "Jurassic World," Wolverine helping young Magneto hunt Nazis, and teaming two villainous Purgers.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys imitate the famous film critic Gene Shalit and come up with blurbs for the movies reviewed on this podcast episode.

Direct download: pitch_244.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:57pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are not recording soon and we have monthly space to give, so enjoy another edition of Ben and George's Saturday Night Live-themed podcast, "Saturday Night Jive." In this episode they cover Adam Sandler and company's excuse for a vacation, "Grown Ups 2," a movie that opens with deer piss and goes downhill from there. Enjoy!

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Direct download: snj_grown_ups2.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 3:27pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are reeling from all the recent news at the annual Comicon and trying their best to respond the multitude of amazing new trailers for TV and movies. the guys then review several movies, notably Disney's new live action "Lion King" remake, and discuss the troubles of photo realism. They close out the episode playing another edition of "So Shalit Be" and imitate Gene Shalit blurbs.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Episode 243 includes:

-So many new trailers but none of them quite as horrifying as the CGI-nightmare "Cats."

-Trailer reactions to "Picard," "Snowpiercer," "His Dark Materials," "It chapter 2," "Watchmen," "The Witcher," "A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood," and "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot."

-Marvel unveils its massive Phase 4 news with movies and Disney+ show announcements plus one buzzy casting choice that irritates Ben (Guess who).

-"Stuber" and "Crawl" are okay genre movies, nothing special, and certainly better than "Polaroid" and local Columbus-made indie "Cadia: The World Within."

-Dinsey's live-action "The Lion King" is something nobody asked for and ready for your shrugs.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys play America's favorite game coming up with blurbs for this week's movies reviewed in the style of famous TV critic Gene Shalit. Madness usually follows.

Direct download: pitch_243.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:06pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are trying to surf the waves of discontent over the anger over a mermaid casting, a bizarre children's movie trailer, the lack of songs in the new Mulan film, as well as making sense of Ari Aster's "Midsommar," a subject that becomes their pitch of the episode as they remake it on the spot via the rules of "Switch the Pitch." The guys close out playing America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," devising blurbs for the films reviewed in keeping with the famous TV critic turned vulgarian.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Episode 242 includes:

-The live-action Ariel will be played by a young black woman, and portions of the Internet are losing it.

-Trailer reactions to live-action "Mulan" and "Spies in Disguise."

-Ben and Nate debate the merits of "Midsommar" and whether it's an improvement from "Hereditary."

-January releases "Escape Room" and "The Kid Who Would Be King" get their due. One is... fine.

-"Spider-Man: Far From Home" is a fun sequel that Ben thinks even does things better than its predecessor.

-This Week's Pitch -- Switch the Pitch: Midsommar!

-The guys play their new game where they roll a die and make up a new version of the movie on the spot. You decide if it's any better.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys wrap up the episode by emulating famed critic Gene Shalit to give blurbs about the movies reviewed on this week's podcast.

Direct download: pitch_242.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:06pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have some business to tend to since they last recorded, now with a new computer and hopefully just as much signature nonsense listeners have come to expect. There are movies high and low to cover, like "Toy Story 4" and
"Late Night" and "The Dead Don't Die." the guys also conclude with another edition of America's favorite game for America's favorite strange uncle, TV personality Gene Shalit.

Available on iTunes and Spotify

Episode 241 includes:

-New and Old Gropers of the Week: Cuba Gooding Jr., Max Landis, and Donald Trump.

-"Men in Black International" is entirely forgettable.

-The guys rant about what might be the worst theatrical film they've watched for 2019 so far, Jim Jarmusch's zombie "comedy" "The Dead Don't Die."

-Ben raves that the "Child's Play" remake is actually great and deserves to be seen.

-"Toy Story 4" is a worthy sequel and actually improves in some ways over its predecessor.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys round out another episode by impersonating TV legend Gene Shalit to deliver blurbs for the movies reviewed this episode and, as always, it descends into madness.

Direct download: pitch_241.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:06pm EDT

Hey everybody, Ben here, uploading the podcast this week because Nate's computer was dying. But anyway, we recorded this one raw without any edits or music, just pure unadulterated Dirty Sons Of Pitches talkin' right into your ear holes. I don't even remember what we talked about because we recorded this several days ago and it's just been sitting on my laptop because I've been too lazy to post it until Nate literally forced me to, sitting in front of me and staring at me with his dead googly eyes until I did so. We probably talked about movies or something. Enjoy.

Direct download: dsop240.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:47pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back with a lot of news and some significant May movies to review and discuss. The guys have Batman news, Game of Thrones finales, and more dead celebrities to improperly mourn. This week's pitch is in honor of "Detective Pikachu" and bringing video game characters into the real world or telling stories within those video game worlds. Afterwards the guys summarize the episode in grand Gene Shalit blurb-style with America's favorite game "So Shalit Be."

Available on iTunes

Episode 239 includes:

-R.I.P. Tom Conway and Grumpy Cat and these are getting even worse.

-"Twilight" star Robert Pattinson is Batman and the Internet is characteristically mad.

-"Detective Pikachu" is pleasant and strictly made for the fans.

-"John Wick 3" is action-packed and glorious.

-The live-action "Aladdin" is NOT a whole new world.

-This Week's Pitch -- Video Game Fish-Out-of-Water!

-Ben pitches a Ninja Gaiden film noir, bringing Mario to the real world where everyone thinks he's crazy, a live-action Donkey Kong series, a GTA story about the NPCs screwed over, and a real-life version of the classic game about avoiding defecating in your pants.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys come up with increasingly bizarre blurbs for this week's films in the style of TV legend Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_239.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:10pm EDT

Here's part two of the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" epic game and pitch relating to the new Avengers blockbuster.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 238 includes:

-Switch the Pitch -- "Avengers: Endgame" Edition

-The guys randomly pitch a new version of the concluding Avengers film from scratch, relying upon a system of dice rolls that determine what plot element to add to build their story one turn at a time. This gets really really epic, and epically long, but if you're a Marvel fan or a fan of superheroes in general, you should be highly entertained by how this pitch shapes up.

Direct download: pitch_238.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:42pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are playing the new pitch/game hybrid once again "Switch the Pitch" to randomly make a new version of an existing film on the spot, but because it was so long the guys have split the podcast into two parts. the first part has them covering the news of the week, including some celebrity deaths and celebrity gropers, and then reviewing the small number of movies seen over the week. Part two will include the massive "Switch the Pitch" recording and how epic it all goes down.

Available on iTunes

Episode 237 includes:

-R.I.P. John Singleton and Peter Mayhew, who the guys honor as best they can, which means... poorly.

-The "Sonic the Hedgehog" trailer was so bad that they are actually redesigning the whole thing.Is it going to be Superman's mustache all over again?

-Ben survived "Ugly Dolls." It got ugly.

-"Long Shot" is suitably romantic, suitably funny, and Charlize Theron has our votes for anything.

Stay tuned for Part 2 with "Switch the Pitch" performed for "Avengers: Endgame" in the next DSOP podcast coming soon!

Direct download: pitch_237.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:03pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are going big, a bigness that is 11 years in the making as they unpack and discuss the mega blockbuster "Avengers: Endgame" and a concluding chapter in the epic Marvel Cinematic Universe. They delay their pitch for the next episode and conclude with another rendition of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be." 

Available on iTunes.

Episode 236 includes:

-Trailer responses and breaking news about John Singleton in a coma (soon to be even more breaking).

-Nate says "Curse of La Llorona" is boring, "Peterloo" is boring, and "Hellboy"is insane.

-Ben sees "Welcome to Marwen" on Nate's dare and rues the experience.

-"Avengers Endgame" is fan service of the highest order. SPOILERS begin at 46:30 minutes in.

-This Week's Pitch! -- Delayed!

-We'll play another rendition of "Switch the Pitch" from episode 236 after the film has a little more time out in theaters for others to catch.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys play another round of impersonating famed film personality Gene Shalit and coming up with blurbs for the films reviewed on this week's show.

Direct download: pitch_236.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:59pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are trying a new hybrid game/pitch this week in honor of the astounding "Hellboy" reboot, so the guys will pitch a new version of a Hellboy movie using random plot elements decided by dice rolls every so often. It's amazing that it's not only cohesive, and awesome, but easily better than the film in theaters. The guy then close out another podcast with America's favorite game, the "So Shalit Be" of "So Shalit Be" games.

Available on iTunes

Episode 235 includes:

-Star Wars is back with a TV show, a new trailer for Episode IX, a new title, and more... of the old.

-"Missing Link" is the least Laika film yet but still charming.

-Nate declares "Dragged Across Concrete" is one of the best films of 2019.

-Ben is flabbergasted by the "Hellboy" reboot.

-This Week's Pitch -- Switch the Pitch (Hellboy)!

-The guys roll a dice to select new plot additions (New Character/Flashback/Plot Twist/Action Scene/Death Scene/Sex Scene) and pitch, on the spot, a new "Hellboy" and it is awesome. This lasts a half hour!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys conclude with another rousing edition of impersonating film critic/social deviant Gene Shalit and coming up with increasingly absurd blurbs for films.

Direct download: pitch_235.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:21pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have come to an auspicious moment in the history of their podcast with the release of their first honest-to-goodness movie, being two of the credited writers attached to a low-budget Netflix film. The guys pitch Tim Burton vehicles in honor ofthe new live-action "Dumbo" and conclude with another rendition of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," this time with the illustrious Gene Shalit providing a blurb for a movie they have written (and was rewritten).

Available on iTunes

Episode 234 includes:

-So... the guys have a movie on Netflix now. That's a thing.

-The new "Joker" back-story trailer reminds you that clowns can also be upsetting.

-The guys enjoy "Shazam!" and Ben dubs it the finest DCU movie so far.

-"Serenity" might have the strangest twist for the year.

-"Dumbo" is a mostly enjoyable whimsical charm.

This Week's Pitch -- Tim Burton Vehicles!

-The guys pitch remakes, comic properties, and other stories for Tim Burton to adapt in his style.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys imitate the style of pun-heavy TV film critic Gene Shalit to review the various movies covered this week including their own.

Direct download: pitch_234.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:18pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" were unable to record this week but in their stead enjoy one of the angriest, most analytical podcasts yet from Ben and George on their "Saturday Night Jive" podcast where they review bad and strange movies starring SNL alums. This week they tackle the epic badness that is 2007's "Epic Movie" and the comedy curse that are Friedberg & Seltzer, writers and directors that confuse references with jokes. Get ready for the pain and enjoy the frustrating and disbelief as Ben and George try and make sense of the madness. 

Available on iTunes

Direct download: snj_epic_movie.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 6:26pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking over their shoulders and questioning mirrors after Jordan Peele's newest horror movie, "Us." and In honor of that film, the guys pitch movies about clones and dopplegangers, and then they wrap up this podcast in grand tradition with America's favorite game, So Shalit Be.

Available on iTunes

Episode 233 includes:

-James Gunn is back aboard "Guardians of the Galaxy 3" and Disney finally consumes the last of Fox.

-Is this the death of the mid-tier movie?

-"Captive State" feels like a neat mini-series smashed into a disappointing two-hour movie.

-Ben finds "Christopher Robin" to be horrifying.

-Jordan Peele's "Us" is spooky and fun... and drops the ball in the third act.

-This Week's Pitch -- Dopplegangers!

-Nate pitches twins dating the same woman and getting into trouble with elected office.

-Ben pitches a series where anyone can do whatever they want with a disposable clone, a man hunts his pwn clones for sport, and the U.S. government must kill a clone of the president once the real deal dies secretly.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take this week's reviewed movies and channel famed critic Gene Shalit to come up with pun-laden nonsense blurbs for each title.

Direct download: pitch_233.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:27pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and celebrating the high-flying first of the Marvel Cinematic Universe with their first female-lead film, the titular "Captain Marvel." The guys pitch prequel movies highlighting other unknown chapters from the MCU and close out the podcast with a wild edition of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be."

Available on iTunes

Episode 232 includes:

-Oscars 2019 recap: the good, the bad, and the "Green Book."

-R.I.P. Luke Perry and Albert Finney and Jussie Smollett's career.

-"How to Train Your Dragon 3" is surprisingly poor.

-If you needed another reason to be uncomfortable with creepy Michael Jackson, might we suggest the 4-hour documentary, "Leaving Neverland."

-"Captain Marvel" is a fine if flawed 90s superhero adventure. Suck it, haters.

-This Week's Pitch -- MCU prequels!

-Ben pitches various prequels highlighting unknown prior chapters in time for the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take the movies reviewed this week and develop increasingly insane Gene Shalit-style blurbs for each. Wait until the end on this one.

Direct download: pitch_232.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:16pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have a litany of news to get through and several movies to get caught up with, leading into the big February releases of "Alita: Battle Angel" and "The Lego Movie 2," and in honor of that block-headed family movie, the guys are pitching Lego movies and series. They conclude with America's favorite game, So Shalit Be, where they adopt the spirit of Gene Shalit to provide blurbs for this week's catalogue of movies reviewed.

Available on iTunes

Episode 231 includes:

-Gropers of the Week: Ryan Adams, R. Kelly, and Max Landis staging a comeback.

-Stop me if you've heard this before: the Oscars came up with a terrible idea that everyone thought as terrible.

-The long-awaited live-action "Alita: Battle Angel" is... fine, big weird anime eyes and all.

-Netflix's "Polar" is gratuitous in every possible way.

-"Lego Movie 2" might not be as fresh but it's still a highly enjoyable family film. 

-This Week's Pitch -- Lego Movies!

-Ben pitches Lego sequels to other existing franchises as well as a movie where their very building blocks are sold as a commodity in a class system.

-This Wee's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys play another round of imitating notable film critic Gene Shalit when it comes to delivering blurbs for the films reviewed on this podcast.

Direct download: pitch_231.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:41pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have been down from some bad weather and mismatched schedules, so in the meantime, please enjoy the podcast that Ben records regularly with his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," where the guys watch and analyze a strange film starring an SNL alum. "I Feel Pretty" stars Amy Schumer as a regular woman who hits her head and suddenly thinks of herself as a slim beauty and struts her stuff. As Ben says, "I don't know if we've ever watched a movie so conceptionally wrong." Can it be saved? Listen to a highly analytical, engaging podcast all about beauty standards, feminism, "El Kabong" logic, and the business failings of a bizarre GroupDate website promotion. 

Available on iTunes

Direct download: snj_i_feel_pretty.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 6:41pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are bundling up during the winter col and polar vortexes and getting lost in the combined cinematic universes of different directors. In honor of "Glass," the guys pitch on the spot shared universes for the films of various directors. Then they end things with America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," and once again imitate the highly imitateable Gene Shalit to come up with film blurbs for movies covered

Available on iTunes.

Episode 230 includes:

-More bad news for Bryan Singer but will it matter to the people with money?

-Oscar nominations are here and Ben doesn't care.

-The feel-good film "Stan & Ollie" answers the question of what John C. Reilly would look like in a big fat suit.

-"Glass" may not have been worth an 18-year wait for fans, but it's still entertaining.

-This Week's Pitch -- Directorial Shared Universes!

-The guys pitch shared stories for the films of Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorsese,

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys go back through the movies of the episode and produce Gene Shalit-quality blurbs for each that inevitably descend into madness.

Direct download: Episode_230.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:02pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are going without their blindfolds to explain the popularity of "Bird Box," the new Netflix horror thriller where everyone, including your mother, has watched it and has soemthing to say. In honor of the new January release "Escape Room," the guys pitch movies to be adapted into real-life escape rooms and how it would best work. To round out the episode, the guys play America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," and ring in the new year right.

Available on iTunes

Episode 229 includes:

-Kevin Hart may come back to the Oscars, Louis C.K. may come back, but are both wanted at this time?

-Ben shockingly loved "Holmes and Watson." No joke.

-"The Mule" does NOT involve Clint Eastwood putting drugs up his butt. You've been warned.

-"Bird Box" is a Netflix sensation and it's... not really that good.

-This Week's Pitch - Movie Escape Rooms!

-The guys pitch movies to be applied to the escape room concept, including "Panic Room," "The Shining," "Saw" and "Cube," and "Jurassic Park."

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take the movies reviewed on this week's show and give them the ole Gene Shalit blurb/madness treatment that icnreasingly becomes more insane and vulgar.

Direct download: pitch_229.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:44pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are revealing their favorite and least favorites films of 2018. Stick around as they debate the highest highs, lowest lows and whether "A Wrinkle in Time" or "Mary Poppins" were originally good sources to begin with.

Available on Tunes.

Episode 228 includes:

-The Best films of 2018

-Overrated and Underrated films

-The Worst films of 2018

-The Rooney Mara Eats a Pie Award for the Best/Worst sequences of 2018

Direct download: pitch_228.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:32pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are readying their best and worst films of 2018, but before they get into the particulars they have some news items and other films to review. This is Part One of the massive end of the year retrospective that was too big for one podcast. Part Two will be uploaded shortly but until then enjoy the boys trying to make sense of Kevin Spacey, "The Playmobil Movie," "Show Dogs," and "Welcome to Marwen" and other 2018 moments of curiosity.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 227 includes:

-Kevin Spacey is not going away quietly and it's utterly bizarre. Will he monologue to the cameras in court?

-Trailer reactions to Jordan Peele's "Us," "Brightburn," and the "Lego Movie" ripoff, "The Playmobil Movie."

-The guys have finally watched "Show Dogs" and lived to tell the tale.

-"Welcome to Marwen" is powerfully misguided.

-Surprisingly, "Hotel Transylvania 3" and "Smallfoot" are both good films about tolerance and the power of skepticism.

Stay tuned for Part Two -- Best/Worst of 2018 Film!

Direct download: pitch_227.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:01pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are closing out he year by reviewing some of the biggest blockbusters of the holiday season, "Aquaman" and "Bumblebee," both movies pivotal to the longevity of their larger franchises. The guys pitch "kid and their dog" stories across an array of settings and genres in honor of the formula for "Bumblebee," and then they close out 2018 by playing one more rendition of "So Shalit Be," coming up with blurbs for each film reviewed. Happy 2019, listeners, and get ready for a Best/Worst of 2018 next.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 226 includes:

-Trailer reactions to "Hellboy" reboot and "Men in Black International" reboot are both shurgs.

-R.I.P. Penny Marshall, the superior Marshall.

-"Aquaman" is enough fun for Nate, but Ben wants it to sink to the bottom.

-"Bumblebee" makes you wish they had been making these kinds of Transformers movies from the start.

-This Week's Pitch -- A Kid and Their Dog Tales!

-Nate pitches a boy and his pet zombie.

-Ben pitches a boy and his cannibal bodyguard, a boy and his dog/werewolf dad, a boy and his robot friend/suit, a woman and the robotic moon, and a Bigfoot family adventure.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys play America's favorite game as they look back at the movies this week and come up with Gene Shalit-inspired blurbs for each one. 

Direct download: pitch_226.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have another round of movies to speed through in an attempt to catch up, ending on the incredible new animated film, "Into the Spider-Verse." In honor of the film, the guys pitch movies from parallel comic worlds. The guys also play another edition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be, coming up with increasingly bizarre pun-laden blurbs for the movies reviewed this episode to honor the legacy of Gene Shalit.

Episode 225 includes:

-The worst song of all time has been unleashed. Have your ears try and comprehend Pitbull's "Ocean 2 Ocean."

-Gropers of the Week: Michael Weatherly and Neil deGrasse Tyson.

-Nate reviews the likes of "Creed II," "Death of a Nation," "Green Book," "Roma," and "Mowgli." Ben reviews "Old Man and the Gun" and "Vox Lux."

-The two of them then review "The Favourtie," "Mary Queen of Scots," "Mortal Engines, and "Into the Spider-Verse," the best 2018 animated film.

This Week's Pitch -- Parallel Comic Worlds!

-Nate pitches a crossover between the Fantastic Four and the better film Fantastic Four, the Incredibles.

-Ben pitches the Canon films version of Spider-Man, the 1970s Japanese Spider-Man, Victorian era superheroes, and Star Trek superheroes.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take all of the many, many movies they reviewed this week and find appropriate and inappropriate blurbs from the mind of Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_225.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:29am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" were not expecting this. They were not expecting a movie so cringe-inducing, maddening, and filled with artificial whimsy that bordered on delusional sadism. The new sequel "Mary Poppins Returns" get the guys going like few others as they try and make sense of what they have just watched as if they have witnessed a Lovecraftian god, which Mary Poppins just might be. Enjoy their lively and disturbed critical and comical analysis of the Disney movie that begs to be belittled and feel bad for Emily Blunt and Lin Manuel-Miranda. And you thought "A Wrinkle in Time" was a bad move for Disney. Just you wait. Just you wait. 

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: mary_poppins_returns.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 11:20pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are busy working on several writing projects, here's another edition of the other podcast Ben and his brother record on a weekly basis, "Saturday Night Jive," where the guys discuss an SNL-alum's very bad movie. This week it's the notorious animated flop that used to be the lowest grossing wide release of all time, "Delgo." It's a special episode of "Saturday Night Jive" combined with Ben's other podcast, "Head Cannon," which makes this a TRIPLE CROSSOVER in the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" podcast universe. Enjoy George and Ben trying to make sense of the senseless.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: 170___The_Crossover_Episode__-_Delgo_2008.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 9:52am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and might be dipping out again soon for other projects, but in the meantime they've got a bounty, a feast of movies to talk about. They limit each movie to four minutes and run through a gauntlet of ten recent releases. The guys also pitch movies set in the Harry Potter universe in honor of the second "Fantastic Beasts" movie, and then they finish off this podcast with a holiday treat, another rendition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 224 includes:

-Is it possible that "Detective Pikachu" might actually be a good movie?

-R.I.P. Marvel comics iconoclast Stan Lee. Excelsior.

-Nate runs through five movies he's seen on his own: "Blue My Mind," "The Girl in the Spider's Web," "Bohemian Rhapsody," "Ballad of Buster Scruggs," and "Widows."

-The guys run through a gauntlet of new releases: "Suspiria," "The Grinch," "Border," "Fantastic Beasts 2," and "Ralph Wrecks the Internet."

-This Week's Pitch -- Potter Universe!

-Nate pitches a look at the wizards vs humans conflict in different eras hinted at with "Fantastic Beasts."

-Ben pitches an Azkaban prison break movie and other movies but, come on, how can we not get an Azkaban prison break movie? That's awesome.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys come up with increasingly vulgar blurbs for Gene Shalit as they spin through ten movies.

Direct download: pitch_224.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:21pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are busy with another writing project, so in the meantime enjoy a podcast from Ben and his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," where the two of them watch and analyze movies starring SNL alums. This week it's one of the biggest SNL stars, Mike Myers, and one of the biggest bombs, "The Love Guru," a woefully misguided crass comedy that all but killed Myers' comedy career. Ten years later, is it as bad as remembered, or will the boys find it to be a hidden gem akin to their reappraisal of Adam Sandler's "Jack and Jill"

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: 156___Chekhovs_Humping_Elephants__-_The_Love_Guru_2008.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 2:29pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are tuning into the mid 90s, a glorious time to be alive, thanks to Jonah Hill's directorial debut, appropriately called, "Mid90s." They're pitching coming of age projects, though assume they have covered this topic previously on a podcast over 220 episodes now. In addition, the guys play a game of Vanity Project to try and get Melissa McCarthy's career in a better place, and the gents round out another episode with America's favorite game -- So Shalit Be. Alogn the way the guys talk about an auditory Terrence Malick, the role piracy has in film preservation, the punishment Ann Dowd must forever pay in movies, the absence of new Christopher Guest films, and a new take on a not-classic nobody has seen, 1990's "Loose Cannons."

Available on iTunes.

Episode 223 includes:

-R.I.P. FilmStruck streaming service and Megyn Kelly's news career at NBC. Only one due to blackface comments.

-Reboots ahoy for the "Pirates of the Caribbean," "Killer Klowns from Outer Space," and "Critters." Guess which makes Ben the happiest.

-Melissa McCarthy impresses just enough in the just good enough true-story, "Can You Ever Forgive Me?"

-Jonah Hill's "Mid90s" is a slight but mostly enjoyable ode to being young and it also has perhaps the most awkward "sex scene" of 2018 cinema.

-This Week's Pitch -- Coming of Age (II?)!

-Ben pitches a time-traveling "Stand By Me," kids coming of age during a zombie apocalypse, kids fighting for the return of the Halloween of old, and a young child rejecting the MAGA path of his family

-This Week's Game -- Vanity Project!

-Ben and Nate discuss a project for Melissa McCarthy that would make the best use of her acting talents.

-Bonus Game: So Shalit Be!

-The guys come up with Gene Shalit-worthy blurbs for the movies they reviewed this week, "Can You Ever Forgive Me?" and "Mid90s."

Direct download: pitch_223.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:09pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting spooky in preparation for this Hallow's Eve and watching the new remake "Halloween" which takes place 40 years after the original. It's intended to skip the other sequels and so the guys pitch other new editions that pretend the earlier sequels never existed. They also play another round of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Along the way learn all about the imprisonment of Fan Bingbing, Ben's pending litigation, a sad state of affairs for Kurt Russell, and a lot about horror franchises from the 80s and 90s.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 22 includes:

-China releases a popular movie star from house arrest and the DCU welcomes James Gunn to their party.

-Producer Jason Blum says there aren't women interested in making horror movies. About that...

-"First Man" is mostly boring and "Bad Times at the El Ray" is thrilling. They're both 141 minutes long. Choose wisely.

-Nate saw the latest (not) midnight movie from (not) cult filmmaker, Neil Breen.

-The new "Halloween" is one half not so great and one half kinda great. It's confusing.

-This Week's Pitch -- Sequel Skips!

-The guys come up with pitches for new editions of famous sci-fi and horror franchises that forget the earlier sequels.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-Another episode of new film titles are given the Gene Shalit treatment for pun-heavy reviews and an increasingly depraved sense of Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_222.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:43pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are keeping busy with some writing projects, enjoy a fascinating film showcased on Ben's other podcast he records regularly with his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," an SNL-related podcast that reviews bad movies starring SNL alums. "Million Dollar Mystery" is a "Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" ripoff that was born as a, for real, real scavenger hunt to the public sponsored by Glad trash bags. It's truly bizarre and Ben and George love it. Give it a listen and you may fall in love too.

Available on iTunes.


The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have scraped all the alien goo they can off the bottom of their shoes to discuss the hot mess that is Sony's "Venom," a Spider-Man villain without Spider-Man in a world possibly unrelated to the MCU. Ben and Nate try and make sense of this senseless movie and while Nate finds the occasional item to enjoy Ben is adamant about the overall terribleness. The guys break down the film, its awful and on-the-nose post-credit scene, Tom Hardy's acting, the number system when it comes to human body secretions, and then in a crossover with Ben's solo podcast "Head Cannon," the guys pitch out the extended cinematic universe for "Venom" across ten different mediums including sequel, prequel, spin-off, cross-over, video game, and porn parody. 

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: venom.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 1:38pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting political with the Age of Trump and the recent Brett Kavanaugh hearings over accusations of his boyhood sexual assaulting. The guys are pitching movies and projects where women fight back against the larger patriarchy, and then after it's another edition of everyone's favorite game. So Shalit Be. Along the way you'll hear all about the horrifying knowledge of what Trump's genitals look like, whether Michael Moore is still relevant and the Trump-to-hitler comparisons are justified, the lasting power of "The Twilight Zone," the horrifying sexy "Handmaid's Tale" Halloween outfit, and the power of baugettes as a visual indicator.

Available on iTunes

Episode 221 includes:

-In other groper news, the Supreme Court might have a sexual assaulting judge soon...

-New James Bond director and possibly a new Bond

-"The House with a Clock in Its Walls" is a fun kids movie from the director of "Hostel." Huh?

-Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 11/9" throws a lot out there and might ultimately be hopeless.

-Ben and Nate rave that "Assassination Nation" is a knockout and one of the best movies of 2018.

-This Week's Pitch -- Women Fight Back!

-Ben pitches a vigilante team fighting the sexual predators and harassers out there, a telekinetic rape revenge film, and the First Lady as a double agent.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take turns offering blurbs in the form of favorite film critic Gene Shalit for this weeks films reviewed on the show.

Direct download: pitch_221.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:39pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are on the warpath this week thanks to the new big screen return of the 80s action star with Shane Black's "The Predator." The guys are pitching properties related to hunters/hunting and play another rendition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Along the way they discuss the whether a "the" counts as a word, the finer habits of masturbatory disposal, whether the "Peppermint" trailer says what it sounds like it says, whether reformed sex offenders should be in movies, the etiquette of movie going with stupid talky kids, and perhaps the most wild and bizarre account of Gene Shalit's after hours activities yet.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 220 includes:

-Henry Cavil hangs up his tights at Superman.

-Gropes of the Week: Les Moonves and Steven Wilder Striegel.

-"Mandy" is a mess and so is "The Nun," but one is slightly more tolerable for Ben.

-The guys disagree over revenge thriller "Peppermint" and whether the trailer indicates that the candy should be found in a place most uncomfortable.

-Shane Black's "The Predator" is too little of too many things, but hey, it says autism is the next stage in human evolution.

-This Week's Pitch -- Hunting/Hunters!

-Ben pitches a reverse "Most Dangerous Game," a mother/daughter team hunting bad boyfriends, and a nationwide manhunt open to the public orchestrated by a vengeful President Trump.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys recap this week's films they have reviewed in the pun-happy styles of America's favorite TV critic and mustache-owner, Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_220.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:00pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking back on the summer movie season with an aim toward correcting several movies that could have used a little help to improve. It's another edition of Fix a Summer Movie. Along the way the guys sweat it out and conclude another summer season of movie watching and podcasting.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 219 includes:

-Asia Argento gets into a #MeToo problem of her own.

-Did you hear that Neil Armstrong is now a commie? The latest on conservative pundit faux controversies.

-It's a medley of meh movies: "Puzzle," "Operation Finale," "The Little Stranger."

-The new "Puppet Master" movie is so bad and insulting to fans that it makes Ben absolutely furious.

-This Week's Pitch -- Fix a Summer Movie!

-The guys make suggestions to better films such as "A Quiet Place," "Deadpool 2," "Hereditary," "Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom," "Tag," "The Meg,"  and "The Happytime Murders."

Direct download: pitch_219.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:48pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking a retrospective of puppets behaving badly in cinema, starting with the new puppet cop comedy "Happytime Murders" co-starring human Melissa McCarthy. After the guys discuss Peter Jackson's notorious "Meet the Feebles," a movie neither of them have watched since high school that does not age well, and then finally on the 1970s pornographic entry, "Let My Puppets Come," about puppets getting into the action. But is a single one of these films actually good beyond the novelty? 

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: puppets.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 12:47pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are fresh from their 48 film fest showing (you can watch their film "Christmas Steve" here) and are catching up with the closing of the summer movie season with a big movie about big sharks and a big movie about big representation. The guys pitch shark movies in honor of "The Meg" and play another round of their favorite, and only, game, So Shalit Be. Along the way they'll discuss the unsung praise of Dan Castelenetta, Movie Pass, whether an Oscar category will stifle mainstream films or give them better representation, the near fatal fight over who should play Aretha Franklin in a movie, the merits of plot over atmosphere, and Ben's new podcast, "Head Cannon."

Available on iTunes.

Episode 218 includes:

-The next Academy Awards will be introducing the category of... Best Popular Movie. Discuss.

-Is Paramount letting "Star Trek" die as a current film franchise?

-Ben is bored to death by "Eighth Grade" and intrigued by "Miseducation of Cameron Post," and the guys discuss the defining traits of coming-of-age movies.

-The 90s rom-com is reborn with "Crazy Rich Asians" and thanks to representation feels fresh again.

-"The Meg" is a fun shark movie that gave Nate enough to enjoy and left Ben wanting a little more bite.

-This Week's Pitch -- Sharks!

-Ben pitches an octopus with shark heads for arms, Hitler shark, a vigilante pledging vengeance against sharks, and microscopic sharks injected inside the president!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys recap the movies they discussed this week but through the lends of pun-happy film critic, Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_218.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:41pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back from making another 48 hour film festival entry and can finally talk about a great new movie, Spike Lee's strange-but-true "BlackkKlansman." The guys pitch movies about minority races, race itself, and racial oppression, and then they conclude the episode by playing another game of everyone's favorite pun-laden film critic, So Shalit Be.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 217 includes:

-Come gather ye children to hear the tale, the tale of Movie Pass and foolhardy venture capitalists.

-Ben pimps his new solo podcast, "Head Cannon."

-Who knew Bo Burnham could be so sincere on behalf of eighth grade girls everywhere?

-"BlackkKlansman" is Spike Lee's best movie in decades.

-This Week's Pitch -- Race/Race Relations!

-Nate pitches a "Babel"-like tale of multiple points of view from immigrants, minorities, and people dramatically affected by Trump policies.

-Ben pitches a varied look at a Trayvon Martin-style tragedy, white America trying to flee to Mexico but foiled by a wall, the life of an Asian guy with a goatee who everyone assumes is a kung-fu master, and a vigilante superhero in an urban neighborhood.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys attempt to form Gene Shalit-worthy puns blurbs for each of the movies they talked about on the episode.

Direct download: pitch_217.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:59pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are picking up the pieces in the wake of some stunning news from Disney, namely the firing of writer/director James Gunn from the billion-dollar franchise he helped bring to their door. The guys discuss new Comicon trailers making their debut and briefly pitch where Gunn and his franchise may go next. Along the way there is also discussion over Gene Shalit's bathroom habits, the moon's response to man leaving behind astronaut excrement, the danger of right-wing trolls being rewarded, a fine year for ketchup, how far is too far with satire, French ignorance, and just how reliably wonderful Tom Cruise is when he's going all-out in an action vehicle.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 216 includes:

-James Gunn fired by Disney for tweets he already apologized for and they knew about two movies ago.

-The guys respond to new trailers revealed at Comicon, including "Godzilla: King of the Monsters," "Aquaman," "Shazam!," "Fantastic Beasts 2," and "Battle Angel Alita."

-"Skyscraper" doesn't quite reach its intended heights; "Sorry to Bother You" goes a little too far in its final act"; "Three Identical Strangers" deserves to be seen.

-"Mission: Impossible 6' is the best in the series and a pure adrenaline rush of action glory.

-This Week's Pitch -- What's Next for James Gunn/Guardians of the Galaxy?

-The guys discuss what projects James Gunn might be well suited for and who might be a replacement director for "Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 3."

Direct download: pitch_216.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:53pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are once again looking at failed TV pilots of old, this time with all Frankenstein-related pilots. It's another fascinating look at an alternate universe of TV that might have been. Remarkably, most of the shows are actually pretty acceptable and in some cases present promise that would never be fulfilled. Stick around indeed.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 215 includes:

-The 1958 "Tales of Frankenstein" was meant to be an anthology horror series by Hammer.

-Writer/director Roger Avary's "Mr. Stitch" 1995 Sci-Fi Channel pilot has just enough intriguing elements that Ben and Nate openly wish they could write it how it should be.

-Dean Koontz's modern 2004 "Frankenstein" with Parker Posey... could be good but we'll never know (it's probably not).

-Instead, the guys watch Andy Kaufman's 1977 pre-"Taxi" pilot "Stick Around" where he's a robot butler in the future and... and it's kinda great.

Direct download: pitch_215.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:29am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have been beset by bugs, both in real life and at the movies. They're back and in honor of "Ant-Man and the Wasp" the guys are pitching movies related to bugs and insects. Along the way they talk about some very specific masculine fears, the nature of film commerce as a Lovecraftian monster, the surge of social significance the "Purge" movies have undergone, the appeal of mob movies, and whether all actors will be replaced with de-aged versions of themselves in the future.

Available on iTunes

Episode 214 includes:

-R.I.P. Steve Ditko, Harlan Ellison, Ed Schultz

-Is ScarJo in another "-washing" casting controversy?

-Has "The Purge" gotten more political and more relevant in the age of Trump? You bet your ass it has.

-Nate has seen the 0% on RT film "Gotti," and the worst thing, by far, is Pitbull's musical score.

-"Ant-Man and the Wasp" is light-hearted comic fun and about what you'd want from it.

-This Week's Pitch -- Buuuuuuuugs!

-Ben pitches a Poe-styled thriller with a killer villainous worm, and an invading plague of bugs and the soldiers designed to eliminate them.

-Nate pitches robot honey bees taking over and a home invasion thriller where one family must face off against a swarm of highly intelligent bugs.

Direct download: pitch_214_A.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:09pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are holding onto their butts for the newest dinosaur adventure, the mega sequel "Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom." The guys pitch Disney sequels to recent films in honor of their newest Pixar release, the long-awaited "Incredibles 2." The guys chat about the Mt. Rushmore of celebrity gropers, the appeal of the "Maury Povich" talk show, the virtue of not wearing pants, a Disney conspiracy to get "A Wrinkle in Time' over the $100 million mark, what makes a good sequel, and an important announcement at the end of the show how things will never be the same for the podcast going forward.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 213 includes:

-Groper of the Week: Nerd magnate and host of everything on AMC, Chris Hardwicke.

-The end of an era: Jerry Springer going off TV after 30 years of chair hurling action.

-"Incredibles 2" isn't up to the standard of the original, but it's still plenty great.

-Jeremy Renner actually steals the show in "Tag," and marvel at his lifelike CGI arms.

-Ben gushes about his favorite movie of 2018: "The Jurassic Games." It's "The Hunger Games" with dinosaurs!

-The new "Jurassic World" is pretty dumb.

-This Week's Pitch -- Modern Disney Sequels!

-The guys pitch sequels on the spot to "Frozen," "Moana," "Zootopia," "Inside Out," and, "Brave," among others.

Direct download: pitch_213.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:40pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are scratching their heads over the buzz-worthy indie horror film "Hereditary" and trying to make sense of the movie and what critics are raving about. In honor of that film, this week they're pitching stories about family tragedies. Along the way they also talk about a variety of topics such as racist mascots, a 1980 movie with black face, sexual side effects of Ambien, a Supreme Court filled with child justices, a "Bad Boys 11" spinoff 15 years later, Ben's ability to be manipulated by his own writing, James Franco purposely playing a sexual predator, and Ben's edict on how certain people are "liking movies wrong."

Available on iTunes.

Episode 212 includes:

-Roseanne might go into porn... now scrub your brain. Also, a trip down memory lane of Skinemax and the virtues of soft core eroticism.

-What are the lessons and effects of "Solo" for Kathleen Kennedy and the "Star Wars" franchise?

-Go see "Upgrade," a fun genre movie, while able.

-"The Strangers: Prey at Night" is apparently a lot dumber than you would even believe.

-"Hereditary" is a horror movie for people that like movies wrong, says Ben.

-This Week's Pitch -- Family Tragedies!

-Ben pitches a woman raised by cannibal parents trying to start her own life, two brothers running a haunted graveyard, and a makeshift team hunting sexual predators from their youth.

-Nate pitches a younger German generation trying to square their idea of their parents going along with the Holocaust.

Direct download: pitch_212.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking their cues from the latest "Star Wars" movie and looking for characters deserving of spinoff prequels. The guys chat about whether Bryan Fuller deserves another TV series to abandon, lawsuits with crude puppets, Morgan Freeman possibly being the next Groper of the Week, Zack Snyder as a Randian, and what makes a good "Star Wars" movie.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 211 includes:

-Talking dog flick "Show Dogs" grooming children for sexual predators? Wait, what now?

-The new "Roseanne" is cancelled because... of Roseanne being Roseanne.

-"Geo Storm" and "Hurricane Heist" are not bad enough to be enjoyable and not good enough to be good.

-Clint Eastwood's "15:17 to Paris" is a boring ride.

-Ben surprisingly loves "Solo" and calls it the best "Star Wars" film since 1983. Nate finds it so-so.

-This Week's Pitch -- Prequel Spinoffs!

-Ben pitches vehicles for Khan, Doc Brown, Power Rangers, Ron Perlman's "Pacific Rim" character, the Vega brothers, the original Joker, and the best little cantina on Tattooine.

Direct download: pitch_211.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:01pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are squeezing time between writing assignments and have a mother of a show to deliver for their listeners. They've got "Deadpool 2" to dissect, a trio of Mother's Day movies ("Tully," "Life of the Party," "Breaking In") and wrap it all up with another edition of everyone's favorite pun-heavy game that goes off the deep end, So Shalit Be.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 210 includes:

-R.I.P. "Superman" actress Margot Kidder, and R.I.P. out good taste when it comes to these things.

-TV cancellations (farewell Alex Inc.) and a surprise 70-episode renewal for "Rick and Morty."

-"Tully" shows motherhood as incarceration, and it's a strong, observant character piece for Charlize Theron.

-"Deadpool 2" is more of the same, which is fine.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys imitate their favorite pun-heavy TV critic Gene Shalit and conjure blurbs he would provide for a batch of randomly selected movie titles.

Direct download: pitch_210.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:43pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are welcoming back Alex Knerem, super fan of geek culture, for this all-out geeky podcast about the ten-years-in-the-making cinematic event, Marvel's "Avengers: Infinity Wars." There a lot to unpack and there will be spoilers after 24:00 minutes in, so beware. In honor of this major event, the guys, with Alex's help, are pitching what's to come in the larger MCU and the many movies yet to come, including the inclusion of the Fox properties, the X-Men and Fantastic Four. Prepared for the overload on geek culture with this episode, folks.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 209 includes:

-Bill Cosby is going away for a long, long time and a place with lots of Jello.

-Anyone else underwhelmed by the latest "Venom" trailer? Anyone?

-"Super Troopers 2" is a decent comedy for fans of the original though not much for anyone else.

-The guys go deep into "Infinity War" with SPOILERS and try and chart all of the major developments.

-This Week's Pitch -- Phase 4 of the MCU!

-Alex pitches the inclusion of a new lineup of X-Men and their focus on social issues.

-Ben pitches a life after "Infinity War" and how to bring in the Fantastic Four and X-Men.

Direct download: pitch_209.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:07pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are wrapping up and revising another writing project for a producer, give a listen to Ben's other podcast he records regularly with his brother George -- "Saturday Night Jive." In honor of Ben Affleck's five-timers club hosting Saturday Night Live, the guys watch the notorious bomb from 2003, "Gigli." It's just as bad as you've heard and maybe worse, accompanied by a tonally awful piano score. Come for the embarrassing monologues about J.Lo's vagina, stay for the anaysis of every wrong-headed decision in this flick.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: snj_gigli.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 2:32pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and extra restful from the time off. There's a lot of news items to cover and several good to great movies as well, making this a bountiful and thankful podcast. The guys record after dark and get a little punchy, a little more absurd, and a little more provocative. If you've ever wondered more about the difference between Allison Mack and Alex Mack and the usefulness of turning into a puddle of liquid metal, then your day has come.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 208 includes:

-Groomers of the Week: Channel Awesome, Allison Mack, and Jon K.

-Stan Lee's blood stolen, which leads to a bizarre KISS anecdote that Ben thinks is the most amazingly metal thing ever.

-R.I.P. Isao Takahata, Milos Forman, Art Bell.

-John Krasinski's horror hit "A Quiet Place" is a simple idea brilliantly executed.

-The sex comedy "Blockers" is charmingly progressive and quite funny.

-"Rampage" is a big, dumb monster movie that works well at being a big, dumb monster movie.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

Direct download: pitch_208.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:41pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are wrapping up another writing project so in the meantime give a listen to Ben and George's podcast, "Saturday Night Jive" where they perform deep dives analyzing interesting and or horrible movies starring SNL alums. The Tim Allen family vehicle "The Santa Clause" is a lot stranger and horrifying than you may recall. George and Ben discuss the mechanics, implications, and the Disney Snow Paws series to boot.

Also available on iTunes.

Direct download: snj_santa_clause.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 9:24pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recording late having just gotten out of a "Ready Player One" screening, and in honor of Steven Spielberg's sci-fi time machine, the guys pitch VR properties, soemthing they amazingly haven't done over the course of 206 other episodes. Along the way they chat about film award eligibility, the Real Dolls, what "gourds must predominate" means, the strange discrepancy between the "Sherlock Gnomes" trailer and its final product, whether we look to theme park rides for our vital historical truths, and why editing the podcast is better for the listeners.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 207 includes:

-I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want... a Spice Girls cartoon series twenty years too late.

-Indiana Jones 5 in 2020.... yay? Will he be in an urn?

-Steven Soderbergh's movie shot on an iPhone is a cruddy looking movie that looks like it was shot on an iPhone.

-The guys saw "Sherlock Gnomes," were flummoxed by the trailer scenes never appearing, and LITERALLY had someone who worked on the movie contact them to answer their theory. A DSOP exclusive!

-"Ready Player One" is first-class spectacle and little else.

-This Week's Pitch -- Virtual Reality!

-Ben pitches a widow bringing his family back to life via VR, a CSI team to recreate final memories of victims in VR, and a man who can download skills to his brain who is being hunted by the government.

-Nate pitches a VR simulator where you can plug in communication and data from an ex and still have them appear via special glasses. 

-This Week's Game -- None!

Direct download: pitch_207.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:45pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting their big screen button-mashing on with the newest incarnation of a movie "Tomb Raider," which inspires this weeks pitch, treasure and treasure-hunting stories. The guys also play another game of their ongoing favorite, So Shalit Be, impersonating beloved, pun enthusiast film critic Gene Shalit.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 206 includes:

-Ava DuVernay gets a new big-budget directing job.... with the DCU... which wants to bury itself even further.

-R.I.P. Stephen Hawking, brilliant scientist and the unknowing bringer of doom for the rest of mankind.

-Anton Yelchin's last film, "Thoroughbreds," is a strongly acted, tense indie thriller worth seeing.

-Take in the madness that is a feature-length game of The Floor is Lava thanks to low-budget Canadian horror flick, "The Bed of the Dead."

-The new "Tomb Raider" is perhaps the best video game adaptation at the movies yet even if Alicia Vikander is no Angelina Jolie in the short shorts dept.

-This Week's Pitch -- Treasure Hunting!

-Nate pitches a scheme where teams must hunt inside the dying body of a wealthy magnate who hid his fortune inside his body.

-Ben pitches kids hijacking a family cruise to hunt for pirate treasure, alien treasure hunt, mob treasure hunt, and parallel world heist crews.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-the guys take the movies they watched this week and produce Gene Shalit-worthy blurbs for each, descending into absurdity.

Direct download: pitch_206.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:06pm EDT

Perhaps the most unexpected "What the Hell Did We Just Watch?" in the history of the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" podcasting, Disney and director Ava Duvernay's adaptation of the children's "classic" left these guys stunned. This big-budget fantasy epic lacks internal logic, clarity, effective characterization, meaningful plotting, and just about everything you would expect from a successful movie. The guys discuss whether the book may be overrated from its original publishing date of 1961, Ben's shell-shocked state, whether Duvernay was ready for this stage, whether making Oprah a centaur would have been more beneficial, when they lost hope while watching the movie, and whether the universe is really just the ejaculate of some infinite being.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: wrinkle_in_time.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 11:37pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are sprucing up for the big night at the Oscars and making their predictions and then tying in an awards-season edition of their favorite game, So Shalit Be. The guys also chat about whether anyone has ever played the game Mouse Trap, the ubiquitous of Eric Roberts, whether a "9 to 5" remake can work in this new post-Me Too era, Shakespeare's inspiration for Othello, the missed opportunity of a modern "Death Wish," the glory of "Game Night," and mansplaining how Gal Gadot should pronounce her own name.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 205 includes:

-Kevin Smith almost died and Joss Whedon is bowing out of Batgirl

-Did somebody make "The Shape of Water" earlier, but with a dolphin and a deaf woman?

-Gropers of the Week: Ryan Seacrest, Alex Jones.

-Ben rails against the live-action "Full Metal Alchemist" and the sci-fi thriller "Annihilation."

-"Red Sparrow" doesn't have the conviction to own its sundry genre elements, even with the naked J-Law.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-Bonus Discussion: Oscar Predictions!

-The guys make their predictions for most of the categories for Hollywood's big night.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys play the pun-happy, Gene Shalit-friendly game, this time coming up with Shalit critical blurbs for all 9 of the Best Picture nominees. 

Direct download: pitch_205.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:38pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are juggling writing recent projects, enjoy listening to Ben's other podcast, "Saturday Night Jive," where he discusses SNL-related movies with his brother, George. This episode is infamous for having the most unexpected of twists: Ben and George find themselves genuinely liking Adam Sandler's notoriously awful 2011 film, "Jack and Jill." Even they are surprised. Maybe you too will think differently after listening to their soul-searching and film analysis. Or maybe you will be driven insane.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: SNJ_-_Jack_and_Jill.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 11:57pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are celebrating Marvel's "Black Panther" blockbuster by pitching black super hero stories. The guys wrap up the episode playing another game of So Shalit Be, especially after discussing Gene Shalit and his potential departure from TV earlier. Along the way the guys discuss not going full-Shalit, what it takes to get a "mulligan" from the religious right, the influx of the F-word on cable TV, the question of why the female nipple is much more offensive than male nipples, whether "Black Panther" is more or less feminist than "Wonder Woman," the fallacy of the supposed Marvel villain problem, Wakanda not getting off easy for ignoring the slavery of its neighbors, and the blaxploitation possibilities of a were-spider-cop.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 204 includes:

-Want to hear about the dumbest controversy possibly ever thanks to irate parents and the movie "Peter Rabbit"?

-Gropers of the week: Shaun White and Scott Baio, which raises the question of whether Scott Baio is still even worthy of press coverage.

-The new Aardman "Early Man" is an unexpected sports film with cavemen.

-"Black Panther" is an enjoyable super hero movie unafraid of its blackness.

-This Week's Pitch -- Black Super Heroes!

-Ben pitches an alien species that seeded the planet in their black image, an inner city girl who is the goddess of bullets, and an X-Men-style story about slaves who develop mutant powers and revolt.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys randomly draw movie titles and try and deliver blurbs in the vein of famed movie critic and pun-lover Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_204.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:10pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have been inundated by J.J. Abram's secretive sci-fi monster series, "Cloverfield," and are looking at the newest film that debuted on Netflix after the Super Bowl. The guys are also pitching movies that could appear within the Cloverfield universe and then playing a new game wherein they try and turn ordinary movies into new Cloverfield property tie-ins. Along the way the guys discuss talk about misinterpreting the "Truth About Cats and Dogs," Christopher McQuarrie's wicked laugh at Henry Cavill's mustache, whether Bryan Fuller will have a career anymore, who is sexier or the better actress: Dakota Johnson or Charisma Carpenter, hummingbird phalluses, the object permanence of masturbation, and what Elizabeth Perkins would do with a thirteen-year-old in a kaiju-sized Tom Hanks.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 203 includes:

-Uma Thurman comes clean on her conflicts with Harvey Weinstein and Quentin Tarantino.

-The team behind "Game of Thrones" is tapped to write and produce new "Star Wars" films, which means finally we get Luke and Leia together.

-"Fifty Shades Freed" is another bad, unsexy movie in a bad, unsexy trilogy of bad, unsexy movies.

-Ben says the Christian-oriented animated film "The Star" is sacrilegious and he's an atheist.

-The sudden "Cloverfield Paradox" might be the worst Cloverfield movie and with the least Cloverfield in it.

-This Week's Pitch -- Cloverfield Universe Movies!

-Ben pitches different movies that could be told within the larger Cloverfield cinematic universe.

-This Week's Game -- Cloverfield It!

-The guys randomly select movie titles and try and adapt them into Cloverfield movies, much like producers have been doing for years with unrelated scripts.

Direct download: pitch_203.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:27pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have returned from another writing project and celebrating their elders. In honor of "Mom and Dad" the guys are pitching movies related to parental relationships. The guys discuss a new breakthrough in porn, whether "Call Me By Your Name" and "Duke Kukem" need sequels, the amazing first movie to play in Saudi Arabia in 35 years, the unsung excellence of Hong Chau, the history of National Lampoon and where their film brand went, and spending eternity with your in-laws and extended family

Available on iTunes.

Episode 202 includes:

-Ben introduces the newest stupefying breakthrough in pornography that will terrify actresses for ages.

-Aziz Ansari is not the same as Harvey Weinstein. Repeat.

-Oscar nominations have been released and hooray for weird movies getting some recognition. The guys run through the major categories and surprises and snubs.

-"Phantom Thread" is a return to form enough for PTA.

-Ben and Nate have wildly different opinions on the wild new movie, "Mom and Dad."

-This Week's Pitch -- Parents!

-Nate pitches Satanic parents waiting for their child to reach a certain age before sacrificing.

-Ben pitches sequels to "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" and "Little Nicky", alien step-parents, zombie grandparents, a ghostly possessed mother-in-law, and a revenge sequel to "The Joy Luck Club."

Direct download: pitch_202.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:13pm EDT

While Ben and Nate finish a writing project, please enjoy another edition of "Saturday Night Jive" the podcast where Ben and his brother George discuss in depth the hilarious bad and bizarre films of SNL alums. The 2000 movie "Duets" is about the exciting world of competitive karaoke starring Gwyneth Paltrow, Paul Giamatti, and Huey Lewis, and it's insane. This was a favorite listen of ours so please give it one yourself.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: snj-duets.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 4:36pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are coming at you from their resident "shithole" to bring you some podcasting goodness. In honor of the new Liam Neeson thriller "The Commuter" the guys are pitching concepts following the same formula of Neeson getting in trouble on different modes of transport. Along the way the guys discuss the teaching pedagogy of James Franco, whether to fight one TV star unqualified candidate with another TV star unqualified candidate, and the almost certainty of how tiny and gross the president's penis must look like for him to behave the way he does.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 201 includes:

-New gropers of the week: Stan Lee and James Franco. Did anyone audit Franco's "classes" before?

-Is President Oprah Winfrey really a possibility? No.

-The guys discuss a new Columbus film "After" that will be making the festival circuit in 2018.

-"The Commuter" is a dumb action movie but it drove Nate mad.

-This Week's Pitch -- Liam Neeson in a Place!

-The guys follow the trend and pitch concept of Neeson running into trouble on different modes of transportation and in confined spaces.

Direct download: pitch_201.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:46pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back for the first time in 2018. There aren't many new releases at this time of year so the guys are catching up on some older 2017 films, mostly animated in Ben's case, and their pitch this week is in honor of Aaron Sorkin's true-life Poker drama, "Molly's Game." The guys pitch stories about gambling. Along the way Ben finds even more to dislike about "The Last Jedi," they discuss the Hulu equal of "Netflix and chill," the culpability of art inspired by bad deeds, and a movie called "Deadly Crossbow Roulette."

Available on iTunes.

Episode 200 includes:

-More gropers of the week: Paul Haggis, Ben Vereen, and Max Landis.

-A Slenderman horror movie is coming, but is this dangerous considering the real-life Slenderman killing?

-Ben zips through many 2017 animated films he's caught up with including "Leap!" and

-"The Greatest Showman" is a sanitized version of P.T. Barnum's life fit for Disney.

-Nate loves "Molly's Game" while Ben finds it all a bit too much Sorkin-y.

-This Week's Pitch -- Gambling Movies!

-Ben pitches a two-hander play about a Texas Hold 'Em game, a heist on a casino planet, a lucky rabbit's foot with unusual consequences, and a future lottery tied into cannibalism.

Direct download: pitch_200.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are inviting their two top guests of the show, Eric and George, to share their own lists of the best and worst films of 2017, as well as those hat were underrated, overrated, and some of the finest performances of the year. Along the way, Nate and Ben share some changes to their Worst lists, now including "The Bye Bye Man" and potentially the really bad "Flatliners" remake. The gang also discuss the indie darling "Call Me By Your Name" and some problematic elements, and ring out the New Year with Gene Shalit blurbs for some of 2017's best and worst films. 

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: pitch_199.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:15am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking stock of the year in film and sizing up their favorite and least favorite films of 2017. The guys share their lists, with many in common, and discuss the year in film as a whole, as well as recently seen films like "All the Money in the World," "Bright," and The Rock's "Jumanji" sequel. The guys discuss plenty of other topics such as a horror-laden "Emoji Movie" sequel, Ben's penchant for a certain specific analogy for subversion, Kevin Smith's hostage video, Ben's desire to sleep with a "Family Feud" host and the guys strange memory of all of those hosts, and why a "fine" movie should no longer be acceptable. Happy New Year, everyone!

Available on iTunes.

Episode 198 includes:

-More "Last Jedi" fallout and sniping fanboys.

-More gropers: Bryan Singer, Dustin Hoffman, T.J. Miller, Gene Simmons, Tavis Smiley.

-Ben loves the Netflix fantasy "Bright" but Nate thinks it's a solid premise that doesn't really go anywhere.

-"Jumanji" is a fun adventure that will also not tarnish your memories of the first film.

-Nate and Ben reveal their Top Ten Best and Worst Films of 2017, overrated and underrated films, and the best performances of the year.

Direct download: pitch_198.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:31pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" tried in vain to do a Director's Cut for Rian Johnson and then just said, screw it, and talked all about the new Star Wars. Ben and Nate have wildly different opinions on the eighth Star Wars film and go into plenty of detail and spittle. Warning, there will be massive spoilers discussed. Grab your porg and enjoy Ben and Nate's take on The Last Jedi.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: pitch_197.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:26pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back, baby, and they are running through a dozen movies to talk about from holiday fare to end-of-the-year awards contenders. There's big change in the entertainment industry with the seismic news of Disney purchasing 20th Century Fox, and the guys discuss the major implications. In honor of "I, Tonya," the guys pitch movies about scandals. In the meantime, enjoy the conversations about van purposes, what it takes to worry Paul Ryan, Bond villain desk settings, and what a Tarantino Star Trek would be like.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 196 includes:

-Disney buys Fox in the business deal of the year. Is having a big fish get bigger a good thing?

-More gropers of the week: Charlie Rose, Matt Lauer, John Lasseter, Garrison Keiler, Mario Batali, more politicians, and it's hard to keep up.

-"The Disaster Artist" is a fun movie for fans of "The Room," "Coco" will make you cry, "The Shape of Water" will make you feel strange things in strange places.

-You can skip "Wonder Wheel," "Roman J. Israel, Esq.," and "The Post." However, do see "Downsizing" for the acting power alone of the incredible Hong Chau.

-"I, Tonya" is a Scorsese film filled with Coen brothers characters.

-This Week's Pitch -- Scandals!

-Nate pitches a character study on Linda Tripp, the woman who recorded her friend Monica Lewinsky's confession.

-Ben pitches the stories of the guy who got caned in Singapore, the "Press Your Luck" expert, Rachel Dolezar, and the killer home butt injection lady.

Direct download: pitch_196.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:18pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are almost done with their writing project, so enjoy one more edition of the "Saturday Night Jive" podcast from brothers Ben and George. This episode features a 1990 Jim Belushi fantasy film where Michael Caine shows him an alternative version of his life brought about from what seems like the most trifling of crossroads. George and Ben unpack the knotty plot, its many absurd implications, and why this selfish dolt is supposed to be the hero.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: snj_mrdestiny.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 6:11pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are on a brief hiatus for a writing project, enjoy another special presentation of Ben and George's regular SNL-themed podcast, "Saturday Night Jive," where they dissect bad and bizarre movies starring SNL alums. The gents tackle 2006's "Little Man" where a tiny Marlon Wayans poses as a baby for a jewel heist. This is one truly gross and disturbing movie, and thankfully Ben and George are there to break it down for the rest of us.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: snj_little_man.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 12:07pm EDT

While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are occupied with a writing project, they're giving the spotlight over to Ben's other podcast he records regularly with regular special guest George. "Saturday Night Jive" is where the guys watch a usually terrible movie featuring an SNL-alum and dissect it thoroughly to hilarious results. With 1987's bizarre double Malkovich misguided rom-com "Making Mr. Right," that extends into questioning why anyone would give a robot foreskin. Also starring soon-to-be Oscar nominee Laurie Metcalf. This is a movie that needs to be heard to be believed.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: making_mr_right.mp3
Category:Saturday Night Jive -- posted at: 4:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are thankful for the riches at the movie theater, though not thankful enough for the bounty of mediocrity that is the DCU. Ben unloads an EPIC 35-minute pitch rebooting the entire cinematic universe, establishing nine movies and offshoot stories, and lots of casting choices. Watch, WB and DC, how it can be done right. It's gotta be better than "Justice League." 

Available in iTunes.

Episode 195 includes:

-Disney is attempting to purchase 20th Century Fox and likely the world at large.

-New gropers of the week: Franken, Piven, Hoffman, Tambor, Stallone, Kreisberg, and so so many more.

-Ben shrugs at the slice-of-life meandering plot of Greta Gerwig's coming-of-age indie, "Lady Bird."

-"Three Billboards" is a searing, insightful, and exceptionally written and acted movie.

-This Week's Pitch -- Reboot the DCU!

-Ben unleashes a 35-minute pitch for the ages detailing the plots of over nine movies to do justice for the members of the Justice League.

Direct download: pitch_195.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:49am EDT

It's finally here. The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" survived "Batman vs. Superman" and "Suicide Squad" and have been dreading the upcoming "Justice League" for over a year. They promised to record as soon as they got out of the preview screening and they are true to their word. The guys dissect the movie and its aggressive blandness and wonder if somehow, paradoxically, it's actually worse than the previous installments. Beware plenty of spoilers.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: justice_league.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 8:47pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking a break from the avalanche of sexual harassment news plaguing Hollywood by... watching a movie that was recently pulled from release schedule because of its creator's year's of sexual harassment and inappropriate behavior. "I Love You, Daddy" is writer/director/star Louie C.K.'s secret movie he filmed in June 2017, and it was set for a national release until The New York Times published a story with women on record saying Louie had done them wrong. It just so happens screeners were sent out before. The guys discuss Louie's history of bad behavior, his career, and they psychoanalyze the film and come to the conclusion it was a confession of his past misdeeds.

Available on iTunes.

Direct download: i_love_you_daddy.mp3
Category:What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- posted at: 11:33am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are thinking of changing their names since the news is a non-stop barrage of bad men finally having their bad deeds coming to the light of day. The guys have many more names to go through, including big names like Kevin Spacey, Brett Ratner, Bryan Singer, and one of the former presidents. In lighter news, they discuss awful new movies like "Goodbye Christopher Robin" and "Suburbicon" before sharing the greatness that is "Killing of a Sacred Deer" and the latest Marvel film, "Thor: Ragnarok." Listen and find out exactly what the Masturbaty is.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 194:

-Another week, another wave of sexual abuse allegations: Ratner, Spacey, Singer, Halperin, Toback, and more!

-Is Tyrese Gibson actively trying to ruin his career?

-"Goodbye Christopher Robin" is a self-parody of feel-good author biopics that is a clumsy mess. It angered Ben so much he left the theater.

-The director of "The Lobster" makes you feel weird and uncomfortable all over again with the brilliant "Killing of a Sacred Deer."

-The third "Thor" movie is the best and a total blast.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

Direct download: pitch_194.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:19pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are a little tired this go-round because they spent the last week seeing nonstop movies in the evenings for your listening pleasure. The guys talk about the awful and hard to follow "Snowman" and pitch far-fetched serial killer ideas. They also close out by playing another game of So Shalit Be, to honor podcast favorite, critic Gene Shalit. Along the way the guys chat about more revelations from the Weinstein fallout, why Mark Felt's story is really boring, the oft-putting sexualization of teenagers in a Tyler Perry movie, the potential dirty puns afforded with a hero named Harry Hole, why sometimes legs are the best option for robots, and something the Columbus filmmaking community has been looking forward to for ages, the screening of zombie comedy "Bong of the Living Dead."

Available on iTunes.

Episode 193 includes:

-More Weinstein news: Academy out, Woody Allen to the rescue, Tarantino and Kevin Smith respond, and more.

-Ben's love for Madea betrays him as "Boo 2" is everything awful that people accuse Tyler Perry's movies of being.

-"The Snowman" is such a bad thriller that they didn't even get to film 15% of the script, and this is according to the director himself.

-The guys discuss the highly awaited premiere of the local zombie stoner comedy "Bong of the Living Dead."

-This Week's Pitch -- Serial Killers!

-Nate pitches a killer fan of Madea at a Tyler Perry convention and people who murder others who say "Happy Holidays."

-Ben pitches a different kind of Zodiac killer, holiday killer, and a vengeful Richard Gere.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys try and come up with pun-heavy blurbs for "Fight Club," "Reign Over Me," "Eating Raoul," and, "Easy A."

Direct download: pitch_193.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:03pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking cues from the film "The Mountain Between Us" and looking at survival stories, including real-life horror show Harvey Weinstein and the ongoing revelations of his history of harassment and abuse. Another week and another raft of news related to the ongoing Weinstein scandal and cover-up hitting Hollywood. The guys also discuss the nature of adapting books and fidelity to the source material, the nature of fan entitlement, Ben's bizarre dream that includes character arcs, cutting off your own arms to form a ladder, the Olestra chips that gave you the runs, and what the level of forgiveness is for Hollywood's offenders and whether it's talent-based.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 192 includes:

-Weinstein update: new accusations, new curious defenders, new gropers, new pained reactions, new revelations. The guys dive into what all of it means.

-McDonald's ran a promotion that angered "Rick and Morty" fans. Ben and Nate take opposing sides.

-Nate has seen "Girls Trip." And...

-Ben says Netflix's "The Babysitter" is a fun horror comedy that needed a better director than McG.

-"The Mountain Between Us" is a survival story without stakes and a romance without chemistry or good characters. But it does have a dog.

-This Week's Pitch -- Survival Tales!

-Ben pitches a man stuck in a bear trap, a couple trapped in a teetering car, a vision quest gone wrong, and an active volcano with killer robots.

-Nate pitches a stranded astronaut drifting in space and reflecting on his or her inevitable death.

Direct download: pitch_192.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:19am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking into the future through the power of the 1980s with "Blade Runner 2049," a sequel 35 years in the making. Ben and Nate try their hand pitching long-in-the-works sequels to 80s movies starring original cast members, and they play another game of So Shalit Be to close out the episode. Once again there's much to talk about in Hollywood and the guys hit a number of topics, including a new addition to Ben's riches-equal-pedophilia threshold theory, how the Queen may or may not go to the bathroom, "Back to the Future" as personal therapy, and the question of how often they'll be revealing sexual harassers in Hollywood.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 191 includes:

-Super producer Harvey Weinstein and Screen Junkies' founder Andy Signore become the latest creeps to be given the spotlight of shame.

-Even Tyrese recognizes people only love The Rock and Statham in "Fast and Furious" franchise.

-Ben is confounded by "Girls Trip" and teaches Nate all about "grape fruiting."

-"Blade Runner 2049" > "Blade Runner"

-This Week's Pitch -- Late Sequels to 80s Films (plus maybe set in 2049)!

-The guys pitch late sequels to 80s movies like "the Karate Kid," "War Games," and "The Goonies."

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys try and conjure Gene Shalit-worthy blurbs for the films "Bruce Almighty, "Frankenweenie," and, "Glen Gary Glen Ross."

Direct download: pitch_191.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:03pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are drawing a line down the middle when it comes to a battle of gender, pitting men and women against one another in this week's pitches in honor of the new film "The Battle of the Sexes." The guys also chat about the first new episodes of "Star Trek: Discovery" as well as other topics such as the horror of Roland Emmerich's "Ghost Chase," buying in bulk with limited edition chips, the medical genius of licking things, whether Elton John should have been more explicit in his cameo, and the DCEU being even dumber than we first believed.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 190 includes:

-Harry Knowles, the pervy head of Ain't It Cool News, is revealed to be the latest film creep who can't keep his hands off of women.

-"Kingsman 2" is an unmemorable sequel that proves Matthew Vaughn may be mortal after all.

-Ben watches "Wish Upon" and wishes he hadn't.

-Is the sports drama "Battle of the Sexes" too kind to its resident misogynist?

-This Week's Pitch -- Men vs. Women!

-Nate pitches a long-standing couple that competes to see who can sleep with the most other people, and a resort that allows you to hunt your exes for sport.

-Ben pitches a bisexual "This Means War," a slasher damsel that turns the table, robots that try and get the last man and woman on Earth to mate, and  romance between two rival serial killers.

-Bonus Discussion -- Trek Talk!

-The guys discuss the long-awaited action-packed two-episode premiere of "Star Trek: Discovery" as well as Seth MacFarlane's homage to Trek, "The Orville."

Direct download: pitch_190.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:11pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" welcome back special guest and "Saturday Night Jive" podcaster George who has devised a special game just for them. He's been eager for weeks to talk about the strange experience that is "The Book of Henry" and has come up with a game to best illustrate the even more strange paths the movie takes. The guys round out the episode with another round of their pun-heavy game So Shalit Be and mourn the loss of Harry Dean Stanton in a typically insufficient way.

Available on iTunes

Episode 189 includes:

-Our long national nightmare is over: J.J. Abrams is returning to direct "Star Wars: Episode 9."

-Nate finds Darren Aronfosky's "mother!" to be an interesting allegory, but knows it will be hated.

-George cites two 2017 movies that stuck with him, "The Circle" for all the wrong reasons and "Wakefield" for all the right reasons.

-This Week's Game I -- And Then...?

-George describes sections of the plot of "The Book of Henry" and asks Ben and Nate to predict what will happen next. they are often wrong as this movie reveals itself to be absurdly wrong-headed.

-This Week's Game II -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys take their turns coming up with Gene Shalit-worthy blurbs for the likes of "Room," "Scott Pilgrim vs. the World," "Hackers," and more.

Direct download: pitch_189.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:07am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are celebrating the latest Stephen King adaptation, the killer clown film breaking all sorts of box-office records, "It." In honor of that movie, the guys are pitching stories about kids against monsters of all types. Stick around for the off-the-cuff conversation tangents like comparing the current "Star Wars" morass to Vietnam, Ben's face blindness with a very specific kind of actor, how a Jabba the Hutt movie could work, the difference between kids who act and kid actors, and a scientific breakdown which role in the human centipede is actually the worst.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 188 includes:

-Colin Treverrow is out at "Star Wars" and Kathleen Kennedy puts another head on her wall. Seriously, what is going on over there?

-Drew Goddard comes in to save the X-Universe right as it appears headed back to dormancy.

-"It Comes at Night" is a victim of misleading marketing and an ending that's just sort of... there. Hint: a plague comes out in daytime too.

-The guys absolutely adore "It" 2017.

-This Week's Pitch -- Kids vs. Monsters!

-Nate pitches an abusive priest who swears his bad deeds are really the demon inside him, so a group of his victims kidnap him and attempt an exorcism.

-Ben pitches killer Jack-O-Lanterns, kids trying to live it up at a murderous summer camp, and ninja kids thrown into a battle they are ill-prepared for.

Direct download: pitch_188.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:56pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are examining phobias and fears for the upcoming clown-centric Stephen King horror movie, "It." They end the episode playing a game of So Shalit Be, where they imitate famed critic Gene Shalit and come up with pun-laden blurbs for upcoming fall movies. Learn much about what Ben thinks about white washing, Michael Fassbender's legacy, whether he could live in the Matrix, where the new "Tomb Raider" movie has gone wrong, and what's really at stake with America.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 187 includes:

-The box-office is at a twenty-year low. How did we get here? Remember Tarsem?

-RIP Tobe Hooper and your crazy horror movies.

-Warner Bros wants Leonardo DiCaprio to play its other Joker. Don't think he's getting out of a supermodel's legs for this one.

-If you like weird whimsy, "Dave Made a Maze" is a DIY delight.

-"Tulip Fever" unleashes a debate over the overall attractiveness of Alicia Vikander and sides are drawn.

-This Week's Pitch -- Phobias!

-Nate pitches a teenager with a phobia of young people who lives in a senior center.

-Ben pitches lots of horror phobia concepts, including a serial killer obsessed with the number 13 and a woman who wakes up on a plane filled with a suicide cult.

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys try and determine what pun-loving film critic Gene Shalit would think of some upcoming movies this fall.

Direct download: pitch_187.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:06pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are doing their best to try and understand what exactly is happening at the Warner Bros offices right now as news item after news item seems to confirm that nobody knows what to do with their DC superhero properties. The guys speculate about the avalanche of prospective news, chat about Joss Whedon's turn of events, the passing of comedy legend Jerry Lewis, and in honor of the live-action "Death Note" film on Netflix, they answer a series of challenging moral questions.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 186 includes:

-Jerry Lewis has died... now when do we get to see "The Day the Clown Cried"?

-WB and DC throw anything at everything at the wall to see what sticks, and Joss Whedon's wife comes forward to argue he is no feminist.

-The new animated Batman and Harley Quinn movie betrays the animated series... and it's got fart jokes too and... rape?

-Nate declares "The Only Living Boy in New York" to be insufferable hipster prattle.

-The Netflix "Death Note" movie is about as disappointing as you knew it would be.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-This Week's Game -- Moral Quandaries!

-Ben quizzes Nate on a series of challenging questions inspired by the moral quandary at heart with "Death Note." Nate learns just how far he'll go for money.

Direct download: pitch_186.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:20am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are catching up on movies, sharing their 48 film fest short, and talking the world of fans and fandom thanks to the indie comedy, "Birgsby Bear." Nate's under the weather and sounding a bit more like Kathleen turner, so excuse his voice. In the meantime, enjoy another ribald entry from your favorite podcasters.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 185 includes:

-Check out the first dramatic short film from the Edwin J. Hill production group, "The Things We Leave Behind" for the 2017 48 Hour Film Fest.

-Lots of Netflix news. Losing Disney but gaining a Shonda Rhimes.

-So WB execs said "Justice League " was "unwatchable." Let that sink in considering these may be the same people that gave a standing ovation to BvS.

"The Dark Tower" will disappoint fans and not fans.

-"Wind River" is an intriguing, character-driven mystery that then.... just explains everything to you.

-"Brigsby Bear" is a poignant and surprising movie that might be this year's "Swiss Army Man" gem.

-This Week's Pitch -- Fans and Fandom!

-Ben pitches a Misery-style kidnapping, a fan dating his older TV sexual fantasy actress, a conspiracy thriller about a lost TV episode no one is allowed to see, and a series based upon the Star Wars commercial kid.

-This Week's Game -- Vanity Project!

-The guys pitch a perfect Samuel L. Jackson vehicle in seconds. That's all it takes, folks.

Direct download: pitch_185.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:27pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have some updates on their progress on short films and have a couple new movies to talk about, one good and one baffling. The guys are pitching product placement movies in honor of "The Emoji Movie" and basically struggling to make sense of a world of ejaculate spiders, Richard Belzer as cereal pitchman, and Rooney Mara's consumption of baked goods.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 184 includes:

-Learn Ben's top five fears in life and the time he almost invited a prostitute into his car.

-Once again, a bushy mustache brings down a DCU movie.

-NBC appears to be trying to invent a time machine to bring back 2000s TV.

-"Atomic Blonde" is "Suicide Squad" done right.

-If you're looking for a movie that features Rooney Mara eating a pie for ten minutes, your time has finally come.

-This Week's Pitch -- Product Placement Movies!

-Ben and Nate pitch movies around Pez dispensers, the Domino's Noid mascot, the mattress sheep, and an adventure with Coke mascots.

Direct download: pitch_184.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:42pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking stock of the lesser films of the summer and coming up with solutions to their myriad problems in their annual edition of Fix a Summer Movie. It was inspired following a car ride back from "Valerian and the City of 1000 Planets." Get ready for a Porgs-porging good time.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 183 includes:

-Porgs... is a thing... a "Star Wars" thing. Ben is unhappy.

-RIP George Romero, Martin Landau, John Heard, and the eternal question over being a boob or a butt man.

-The guys are underwhelmed by Nolan's "Dunkirk" and find it the least memorable film of his career.

-It should have been called "Valerian and the City of 1000 Better Ideas." Whew boy.

-This Week's Pitch -- Fix a Summer Movie!

-Ben and Nate make suggestions to better "Valerian," "King Arthur," "Baywatch," "Alien: Covenant," "Cars 3," "Transformers: the Last Knight," and "The House."

Direct download: pitch_183.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:40pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and remind you to go see "Spider-Man: Homecoming" and "War of the Planet of the Apes," two of the best films of 2017. There aren't too many new movies to talk about this week so the guys catch up with news items, Ben confesses a personal problem, and they pitch movies dealing with wishes or genies in honor of "Wish Upon," a film neither has seen.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 182 includes:

-Disney's "Aladdin" is having trouble finding its lead, Star Wars Monopoly is having problems keeping its promises, and Ben is having his own problems.

-"The House" is a comedy that can't find its funny.

-Learn where Mike Myer got the inspiration for Austin Powers from in an old movie where people hunt others for sport.

-How in the world is a 1980s movie where Charlotte Rampling has an affair with a chimp this strangely dull? Welcome to "Max, My Love," a failed "What the Hell did We Just Watch?" entry.

-This Week's Pitch -- Wish Pitches!

-Ben pitches a sci-fi horror story about creating matter, a woman who can make anything happen by muttering a phrase enough times, and a man who wishes to be the wealthiest and smartest where everyone else just gets impoverished and dumb.

-Nate pitches a "nice guy" who can wish any girl to fall in love with him, but if he wants to trade his trophy, he has to kill the current one.

Direct download: pitch_182.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:05am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have several new movies to talk about, which include two of the best movies of the year and one of the worst. On top of that, there's seismic news on the "Star Wars" front with the ongoing drama lingering from the directors of the Han Solo spinoff being fired.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 181 includes:

-What the hell is going on in the world of the "Star Wars" spinoffs?!

-The new "War for the Planet of the Apes" is a blockbuster with soul and everything missing in big-budget movies.

-The guys review a slew of movies starting with B (Bad Batch, Beatriz at Dinner, Below Her Mouth), and all of them disappointing.

-The fifth "Transformers" movie almost killed Ben.

-"Spider-Man: Homecoming" is the best Spider-Man film and arguably the best MCU film yet.

Direct download: pitch_181.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:15pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking the unexpected role of serving as defenders of the much-derided Tom Cruise action film, "The Mummy." The guys explain why they don't understand all the hate. They then follow that by pitching the rest of the Dark Universe, the latest cinematic universe meant to combine all the classic monsters from Universal's older era. Also, Ben is forcibly capped at five "Wonder Woman" name references.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 180 includes:

-R.I.P. Adam West, the man who saved Batman.

-Terry Gilliam achieves the previously unachieveable and Kevin Smith surprises by being able to keep his mouth shut.

-Does the 2017 "Flatliners" have the worst music choice of any trailer ever? Listen for yourself.

-"Cars 3" is the worst Pixar movie and the laziest.

-Why are the funniest parts of the bachelorette party gone wrong comedy "Rough Night" the parts with ScarJo's fiance?

-Surprise, "The Mummy" is a very enjoyable B-movie and Ben and Nate tackle and counter the biggest charges against this film.

-This Week's Pitch -- Dark Universe!

-Ben and Nate pitch the ongoing Dark Universe films and their monster adventures.

Direct download: pitch_180.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:09pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are bringing out the lasso of truth to analyze the big-budget, highly anticipated close-up for Wonder Woman. Ben has a lot to say on the matter and further develops his thesis about the perils of low expectations. The guys talk so much about Wonder Woman that only Ben takes a turn pitching female superhero stories. Stay for conversation on cartoons shooting above the heads of their audience the weird things you might find in vending machines, Yelp reviews for dentists, Ben's stance on all non-Dragon Force music, and the power and detriment of holding onto a hilariously anachronistic article of facial hair.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 179 includes:

-News on the Monster Universe and the Dark Universe a.k.a. the Universal Monster Universe.

-What kind of life awaits the talking toilet in "Beauty and the Beast"?

-Nate and Ben think the French cannibal horror film "Raw" could have been a bit rawer.

-"Wonder Woman" symbolizes everything wrong with moviegoing audiences for Ben, whereas Nate found some enjoyable things. This is a wide-ranging discussion that lasts for a solid half hour. Stay tuned at the end for a discussion over a big, bushy mustache.

-This Week's Pitch -- Female Superheroes!

-Ben shares some of his prior pitches and characters from his complicated comic book universe of ideas.

-This Week's Game -- No Game!


Direct download: pitch_179.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:02am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are going back in time to the most awesome of decades, the 90s, in honor of the not-so-good remake of the 90s international hit of blondes and boobs, "Baywatch." The guys pitch TV shows from the 90s to be rebooted into movies and take a stroll down memory lane essentially recounting all the various TV shows, known and little known, that they loved.

Available on iTunes

Episode 178 includes:

-RIP Roger Moore, Caitlin Bree, and Zach Snyder's daughter.

-Ben sets the record straight for the "Star Trek" fans upset about the TV show being diverse.

-Ben and Nate differ on "Pirates 5" but agree Johnny Depp isn't even trying anymore.

-"Baywatch" is a movie that doesn't know what it wants to be.

-This Week's Pitch -- 90s TV Reboots!

-Nate pitches reboots for "Lexx," "Walker Texas Ranger," "G vs. E," "Brimstone," and several more.

-Ben pitches reboots for "Beast Wars," "Mummies Alive," "Secret World of Alex Mack," "Clarissa Explains it All," and several more.

Direct download: pitch_178.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:10pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are shivering timbers and yo-ho-ho-ing it up in honor of the next entry in the "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise from Disney. They also watch like 15+ trailers for the new TV series coming out this summer and fall and offer their initial thoughts, which are not that promising. Come for the movie talk, stay for the conversations over little person twins, Jared Leto's intense Method acting habits, and who cares at all about a TV show about podcasting.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 177 includes:

-What if everyone on Earth had a secret little person twin psychically linked to them? The guys uncover the truth.

-The guys preview a LOT of upcoming new 2017-2018 TV shows and offer their dismal opinions.

-Ben at long last has seen "The Boss Baby"!

-"Snatched" marks the return of Goldie Hawn who, having seen her shadow, will retreat back to her hole for another 15 years.

-Nate says "Alien: Covenant" is more of the same but there is double the Fassbender.

-This Week's Pitch -- Pirates!

-Ben pitches parallel reality pirates, an alien invasion with space pirates, and pirates that travel within the world of books.

-Nate pitches a woman who poses as a boy to sail with a pirate crew for adventure and to leave her old life behind.

Direct download: pitch_177.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are celebrating Mother's Day by pitching movies about parent/sibling adventures, also in honor of Amy Schumer/Goldie Hawn's comedy vehicle, "Snatched." The guys wax over a bevy of topics and attempt to play a game of "Re-Cast It" with the mother/daughter team in "Snatched."

Episode 176 includes:

-More Hellboys and more Deadpools coming your way soon.

-Debate over gender differences in acting awards and where exactly a trans actor would be slotted.

-"King Arthur" isn't even the best movie this year with "King Arthur" in its title. This is a mess of a movie.

-"Risk," the new doc on Julian Assange and Wikileaks, isn't worth much of the effort.

-Stay tuned for an extensive discussion over 1996's "Showgirls" and Ben learns that Paul Verhoeven directed it for the first time in his life.

-This Week's Pitch --Parent/Sibling Buddy Films!

-Nate pitches an absent father who comes back into his adult son's life to reveal a horrible secret that will help the son have a baby.

-Ben pitches an ailing hitman father who kidnaps his adult child to spend time with him while on the run, a secret agent who has to bring his baby on missions, and a crazy series of family games to determine the heir of a corporation.

-This Week's Game Re-Cast It!

-Ben and Nate almost go through with recasting "Snatched" in different decades but then give up.

Direct download: pitch_176.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:46pm EDT

With no new movies to chat about, the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking back once again at failed TV pilots and wondering "what if" scenarios. The guys tackle three failed pilots from the 1970s, one of them weirdly entertaining, and then play another round of their newest and possibly stupidest game, So Shalit Be.

Available on iTunes.

-Episode 175 includes:

-"Black Bart" is a sequel to "Blazing Saddles" that was made for four years in secret just to meet a contract loophole.

-"Baffled!" is the famous pilot where Leonard Nimoy is a race car driver who gets psychic visions. How did they make this boring?

-"Starstruck" is a 1979 "Star Wars" ripoff/strange sitcom/family drama about a hotel and restaurant... IN... SPAAAACE. It's oddly compelling. See it for yourself on YouTube.

-This Week's Pitch -- None!

-This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be!

-The guys pull random movie titles and attempt to come up with pun-heavy blurbs for them from the fabled mind of film critic and pun lover, Gene Shalit.

Direct download: pitch_175.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:04pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recording after dark and hot off the presses after coming from a screening of "Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 2," so they're a little tired and punchy, which makes for a slightly loopier podcast. The guys pitch montser-as-metaphor ideas after Anne Hathaway's "colossal," and then they call it a night.

Available on iTunes

Episode 174 includes:

-Director Jonathan Demme joins all those lambs.

-Ben loves "Guardians 2" and declares it better than the first, and Nate enjoys it thusly but prefers the first tune.

-Ben rewatched all the Harry Potter movies and has some new insights and questions.

-"Colossal" is a very different monster movie and even different from the advertising.

-This Week's Pitch -- Monster as Metaphor!

-Ben and Nate take turns pitching movies where monsters double as metaphors for struggling characters and their conflicts.

Direct download: pitch_174.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:28pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are grinding their gears over the eighth film in the never-ending "Fast and the Furious" franchise, and rather than pitch something related to this franchise again, the guys are pitching projects related to "Free Fire." It's stories based around one mistake that spirals out of control. Afterwards, the guys play a game of Re-Cast It to improve "Free Fire" and offer better characters into the same firefight scenario.

Available on iTunes.

-Episode 173 includes:

-Is there a darker undercurrent behind the tomato/tomatoe song?

-Reactions to new trailers for "Thor Ragnarok" and "Star Wars: The Last Jedi." Hint: one of them is positive.

-"Fast 8" is an absurd and ridiculous movie and that's still the best selling point.

-Ben sings the praises of the practical effects horror thriller "The Void."

-The would-be Tarantino knockoff "Free Fire" shoots blanks.

-This Week's Pitch -- One Mistake Goes Wrong!

-Nate pitches a lottery winner who gets his wallet and ticket stolen and the violent calamities that follow to gain control of the ticket.

-Ben pitches a man set off on a killing spree from the wrong breakfast order, and a space ark where one extra person upsets the balance of elements.

-This Week's Game -- Re-Cast It!

-Ben and Nate recast "Free Fire" by slotting in their own gunslingers, you know people with personality, and debate who would be the one to make it out alive.

Direct download: pitch_173_full.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:26pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" had planned a "What the Hell Did We Just Watch?" edition for surefire disaster "Monster Trucks" and then had to change those plans when the movie actually proved to be okay. In light of that, the guys threw together pitches for family films based upon puns. Yeah, it was a bit of a stretch. The guys also introduce a new game that leaves them giggling like mad, the pun-laden world of Gene Shalit, the podcast's favorite film critic, is put to new use. Happy five years podcasting.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 172 includes:

-The guys debate the appeal of exploring dark places.

-A potential "Purge" TV show should make a killing. Get it? Get it?

-Ben says so long to "The Bye Bye Man" (DON'T THINK IT! DON'T SAY IT!)

-Surprise of 2017: "Monster Trucks" is actually an okay kids film.

-This Week's Pitch -- Pun-Based Children's Films!

-Listen for pitches for "Couch Potato," "Dog-Gone-It," and "A Monkey's Uncle" to know how far the realm of children's entertainment has come.

-This Week's Game -- Gene Shallit-Off!

-The guys randomly draw film titles and have to come up with a prospective blurb from Gene Shalit. Puns!

Direct download: pitch_172.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:00pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recording after dark once again and it certainly brings out an extra dose of anger in Ben's case about a certain live-action remake of a classic anime. In honor of the Netflix original sci-fi movie "The Discovery" the guys are pitching stories based upon an unusual afterlife scenario.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 171 includes:

-Jordan Peele being courted to direct live-action Akira... run away, Jordan... run away.

-Ben unloads on "Ghost in the Shell" and says it is worse than "Suicide Squad," his worst film of 2016.

-Nate says "The Shack" is the most laborious Ted talk ever.

-Ben couldn't even get through "Why Him?" thanks to James Franco's balls.

-"The Discovery" is the kind of story that Garp would have written.

-This Week's Pitch -- Unusual Afterlife!

-Nate pitches a mystery of people waking up in a white void and trying to figure out where they are and who they are.

-Ben pitches the soul as a database that's found and exploited, the discovery that everyone who dies goes to a Hell, and being reincarnated as aliens across the universe

Direct download: pitch_171.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:27am EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" welcome back fan of the podcast and overall Power Rangers fan Alex Knerem for a Power Rangers heavy episode now that Ben's most anticipated film of 2017 has come to theater. Expect lots of Power Rangers minutia while Nate tries to play the novice in this world of teenager drama and giant rubber monster suits. Go go, Dirty Sons of Pitches!

Episode 170 includes:

-The new "Justice League" trailer is out and it looks like hot garbage.

-Alex gives his thoughts on "Split," "Logan," and "Get Out," a movie that made him rethink his general dislike of horror.

-Nate says "Life" is an "Alien" ripoff and that's okay.

-"Power Rangers" may not have been the greatest movie of all time... but it was a fairly enjoyable franchise starter.

-This Week's Pitch -- Power Rangers!

-Alex pitches a recreation of an obscure Marvel comic "Team America" (no relation to the 2004 movie) based upon Evel Knievel toys.

-Ben goes nerdy to the next power by unleashing a torrent of Power Rangers pitches he's been waiting years to share.

Direct download: pitch_170.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:41pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recording after dark and are a bit punchy, as quickly evidenced from their opening conversation. In honor of the horror B-movie "The Belko Experiment" the guys are pitching movies based around an office setting. Enjoy this especially energized podcast as the guys come to their 5-year podcasting anniversary. Also listen in on playgrounds in theaters, a possible "Matrix" reboot, why the Enchantress would leave helpful magical items to the Beast she cursed, whether Belle and the Beast had sex, Vampire Ice-T, and the latent labial nature of human-possessed wardrobes.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 169 includes:

-Watch as a conversation about Chuck Berry possibly being in hell goes to anatomical lengths never before imagined.

-What do Russia and Alabama have in common?

-Surprise, "Beauty and the Beast" is a charmless, inferior version! Do not be our guest.

-Ben defends Netfix's "Iron Fist" from attacks, and also berates those who complained about "Passengers" but excuse the Stockholm syndrome of "Beauty and the Beast."

-"The Belko Experiment" is a bloody, entertaining, good enough B-movie.

-This Week's Pitch -- Office Life!

-Nate pitches an office workplace comedy set in Heaven trying to make sense of God's contradictory demands. And then God goes missing.

-Ben pitches an office building during a zombie apocalypse, an Everything Evil office setting, two men competing to build the tallest building, and a Die Hard on take your child to work day.


Direct download: pitch_169.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:44pm EDT

The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are recapping Oscars, lapping up R-rated Wolverine movies, and pitching final farewell stories for superheroes. It's a slightly delayed episode but the discussion will still be the same old level of esoteric nonsense and entertaining stream of consciousness banter.

Available on iTunes.

Episode 168 includes:

-The live-action "Beauty and the Beast" is banned from an Alabama drive-in. Not for the reason you may think.

-Oscars shock the world and one last "F U 'La La Land.'" Ben and Nate assess the Oscar telecast and make sense of its twist ending.

-Ben and Nate saw "The Red Turtle" and it was... fine. Ben was let down by the all-female directed horror anthology, "XX."

-"Logan" is a bloody, satisfying, mature finale. They saved the best for last. Where does the X-Men franchise go from here?

-This Week's Pitch -- Final Superhero Stories!

-Nate pitches a superhero retirement home and a mysterious killer stalking the ailing residents.

-Ben pitches an epic end of the Marvel Cinematic Universe that starts for Captain America when America elects... Trump, and it involves every big name character like Iron Man and the Hulk in a typically epic fashion. Strap in, folks.

Direct download: pitch_168.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:19pm EDT